Dirty dating game

Dating simulation games started gaining popularity in Japan during the 90's. However, this was never the case in other parts of the world. Video game magazines that I read regularly would cover Japanese imports and niche titles, but dating sims were merely a curiosity and nothing more. Dirty Dating Games Full combination of Dirty + Dating Games = Unlimited Fun and Entertainment. ... Start speed dating game to play to get ideas for your dating, persude boys to go with you for dating. If you win 3 hearts then you can go with him and furthe... Dating Game Questions: Back in those times, dating used to be one serious affair. But in these days it is like the child’s play for the adults. You can even find like hundreds of apps through which you can date anyone you like. ... Most Check: Dirty Questions to Ask a Girl. It is the perfect game if you want to know the dirty secrets of your partner or friends. If you are playing this game with your friends or family members, you need to pay attention to the choices they make as they will bring you closer and you will be able to know whether they are adventurous or mild and if they would rather work or party all day. Exo Dating Game. Winter Dance Sim Date. 7 Dates Second Date. Romantic games like Dating Frenzy 2 focus more on meeting guys and girls and starting conversations. 5 Best Free Online Kissing Games. In real life and online, sometimes all you really want is an awesome make-out session, and that’s exactly what these 5 kissing games provide. The game proceeds like a normal Jenga game, where each player takes turns in removing a tile from the stack. Each player is assigned a tile color, which is the one they can only remove. The player who topples the tower must strip and the game can proceed again. [Read: 10 dirty drinking games for naughty guys and girls] dirty dating games, dirty dating games - Demi Lovato is a star of the Disney World. She is acting, singing and she is dating one of the Jonas Brothers right now. She is going to a huge event and she needs to be cute for that night. Dress her the best as you can so Joe will be happy with her look. Choose an elegant dress or outfit, some accessories as the beautiful fashion jewelries and a new ...

34 [M4F] US/Anywhere - Looking towards the future

2020.10.22 21:13 4C9XEJ4TGKNBP86W7G4B 34 [M4F] US/Anywhere - Looking towards the future

The online dating apps have been a bit lack luster for me in trying to find a prospective partner in crime, and so far posts haven't helped me find that special someone. Yet I have not given up hope. What I am looking for is probably the same thing many others are looking for, it just takes a bit of patience. So I hope you like reading, you might be in for a bit.
My hopes a dreams in the realm revolve around finding someone to navigate the passage of time with. Someone to laugh and cry with, one who knows relationships take work and won't give up when things get tough, that ride or die type of lady. I have dreams of traveling, dreams of a family, dreams of getting to wake up next to my best friend.
About me:
-Tend to be on the introverted side, laid back attitude, go with the flow type of guy.
- 5'11" though I don't have a sign that says "You must be this tall to ride this ride."
- Average build - I think I look pretty good but you can be the judge of that.
- Raised by hippies - 420 friendly, won't push it if you are not. Just know I enjoy a little de-stressing now and then.
- Heart of a kid, mind of a dirty old man - I tend to have a weird/dark/perverted sense of humor. Some may stop here and say: "Oh great, just another horny guy." And what I will say is: Yes, I am 34 I'm not dead. I have my moments and realize not everyone is the same.
- Love language is physical affection and cooking. If you have a favorite food or dessert I will likely try and make it for you. If you are doing something I will more than likely come up from behind to provide neck kisses and sneak hugs. Gift giving isn't really my thing, so if being showered in trinkets is something you like we may not be a good match.
-Lover of a good story whether it be movies, TV, books, anime, audio books, or podcasts. I am an audiophile, so I love music as well.
- Believes a healthy relationship is complex and requires communication. I want to find something for the long run. It gets tiresome to meet someone, find value in them, only to be ghosted.
- Will provide entertainment by way of singing and shuffling about as I cook or clean. My lack of dancing skills will be very apparent, but I am always down for some kitchen dancing. I am also tone deaf, but that won't stop me.
- Enjoys cooking and baking - I tend to make simple dishes due to being primarily gluten free (something that is unfortunate as I love baked goods.) I liven things up with spices, so there is always the chance I get a little wild or overboard. During the winter I am planning to advance my baking skills to see if I can make so good gluten free options for the things I am missing in my life. Like bread...
- I am happy to chill at home, cuddled on the couch, watching a movie or binge watching a show. However, I am just as happy to go on an adventure to enjoy fresh air and the out doors, whether it be a hike, drive to the coast, or maybe even to just get tacos.
- I am a computer geek - I work in technology and tend to be a problem solver or try to be. I grew up around computers and electronics to I naturally fell into gaming as a worthy pastime. I also like board games and trying to get into DnD.
-Things I like to do when the world isn't fighting a pandemic: Autocross, concerts, traveling/beach vacations (Aruba anyone?), cider festivals, wine tasting, cultural festivals, etc. Note: it isn't a requirement for me to have shared interests. Having some is nice, but I also value time to do my own thing. Not everyone can stomach when I go out on a drive by myself, but you are welcome to join either way.
- Would like a family when the time is right. I think I would be a pretty good Dad, probably the cool laid back dad that teaches the kids the geeky stuff.
- I look for personality more than I do looks. Somewhere on the demisexual range of things, though physical attraction does come into play. I like average build/curvy women, though eyes are my weakness. Exotic women also get some bonus points.
- I am open to something long distance with the knowledge that when traveling is a bit easier we can meet. Places that I want to travel in the near future: Japan, Philippines, Aruba, Mediterranean, Europe, etc. So if you are from around those areas hopefully we can work towards an adventure. If you are from else where, maybe you can help me add that location to my travel list.
There is probably a bunch more that I could write, so if you made it this far I appreciate you taking the time to read this post. If you feel inclined to message me, please tell me a little about yourself. Any interests? Dream vacations? Baking recipes you can share? Share a picture of yourself with me and I will reply in kind. Thanks!
submitted by 4C9XEJ4TGKNBP86W7G4B to ForeverAloneDating [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 21:09 Laylikecheese Dating a literal sociopath...

I just broke up with this guy bc he was crazy. On our first date I told him I don’t like being under a guy 24/7 bc i initiate a lot so if I’m having to give all the time I’ll never want to do it on my own. I told him what I was working on for myself, my goals, my demons, and all. He seemed to fit perfectly for what I wanted and it was too good to be true. I figured I finally found someone who was my match. I was head over heels in the honeymoon phase but by the time he showed his true colors it was too late. I realized he’s none of the things he pretended to be and only became what he saw I liked in a man. Usually after about 7 months of dating someone you don’t feel as head over hills anymore. You still love them but you feel secure and don’t desire them as intensely as at first. With him it only got worse over time not better. He used to follow me to the bathroom while I pee because he grew up doing it with his mom. I found out he’s not independent like he said he was and has actual abandonment issues due to the fact he became an orphan at 11. Nothing against things we can’t control but he needs help and refuses to get it. He became someone completely different. I can’t talk to him about it because when I do he just becomes who ever I want him to be to please me. He constantly says he misses me. It’s okay every now and then but I literally left for five minutes and he was hugging me tight saying it felt like forever when I got back. I tell him how I feel and he just gets the idea that I don’t love him. I have to force him to give me boundaries and space which is something I feel like I shouldn’t have to do. I’ve never had this happen before. By the time I realized he had problems I was already a year in. He did a good job at hiding who he really was. One time his friend upset him and he blew up and started slamming and throwing stuff screaming at his friend. I told him that he was being violent and aggressive and I let it go because he shoved it off as “just being mad” “and passionate about his feelings”. I never forgot this though. Over time he’s become too much for me. He made me share my location with him so he can know that I’m safe and “made it where I needed to safely”. I turned my location off so I could feel like I had freedom. After a while he finally stopped checking bc I made sure it was off when I was out. He talks crap saying his exes were bitches, thots, and horrible ppl. I see why he’s never had anything long term. He makes me uncomfortable and he’s insane. He told me about what he used to do to get his ex back and I feel like if I break up with him now he’ll show up at my parents house or go out his way to hurt me bc I left him and it hurt him. He’s obese and tall so physically I couldn’t defend myself if he tried anything. He’s threatened me saying he’d kill both of us if I ever hurt him. Or saying if I ever hurt him he hopes he doesn’t black out and do anything. One time he said that he had an std and he gave it to me without me knowing as a joke. Then he got mad when I was upset saying he was dirty and I was going to get tested. He says a lot of stuff that I feel like normal ppl just shouldn’t feel comfortable saying. I know a lot of guys who are codependent but idk if this is normal. He’s 20 and still asks me to wash and do his hair bc he doesn’t know how and is too lazy to learn. I’ve started lying, thinking about cheating, and became non affectionate bc he’s smothering me. He does things I tell him I don’t like then gets upset and tries to get me to be okay with it or get me to like it. Like one time he told me we were going out to eat later that night. I get there, get in his car, and he starts picking up his friends calling them and joking saying they were going to have fun. I didn’t have my car to leave so I just had to sit there. I hate bowling. I can’t bowl, I tried, but it’s not fun to me. I like art and doing non competitive things. I was miserable and had the lowest score in the board. His friends were making fun of how I threw the ball and how I was so behind everyone else. He chimed in and laughed with them saying I created my own game by myself bc I was so bad. He shoved it off as joking and says I’m so soft and I need to be a woman with a backbone bc I was offended. I went to the restroom and teared up a little and ignored his calls. I stopped playing with them and they all knew I was upset. Now here I am being the party pooper. I told him how I felt and he played victim saying he was sorry and haven’t had a lot of girlfriends and all that shit. We aren’t perfect and considering his upbringing I’ve tried to teach him how to treat ppl better but I’m getting tired of it. He’s always saying how he was close to his mom although she was on drugs, praising her saying how he wished she was still here. He told me although his dad left he just wanted to know him as a person and wasn’t mad just curious. Then on Father’s Day on his social media he makes a post saying fuck his dad and how much he hated his dad as a man. Then I suspected that he probably resented his mom, and hated her bc she abused him but since she’s dead he’s lonely and created a false image of her in his head to cope. I’ve never actually met someone who was crazy. Like actually crazy.
submitted by Laylikecheese to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 17:42 JMcCFineArt A Basic Guide to Buying & Selling Art - from an art dealer with 8+ years of experience

*Due to the support from people on my first post, I’ve decided to do my best to lay out a beginner’s guide to buying and selling art. Please note, it would be impossible to cover everything you need to know (some people dedicate their entire lives to learning a small corner of the art market), but hopefully I can provide enough information here to give you the confidence to get started. As always, my dm’s are open to any specific questions you may have now or later. I will also start posting on YouTube which gives me a bit more freedom in terms of the content I can share.

Before I dive into the guide I want to pose an important question: Why buy and sell art?

When I started out buying and selling art over 8 years ago, I had no idea what I was doing. I had zero knowledge of art history and no understanding of the art market. What I did have was a smartphone and a passion for flipping. Over time I would eventually also develop a deep passion for art.
The main reason that I became drawn to art, and still am today, is the breadth of the market and the potential. When you think about the potential for flipping art, it is massive. The biggest “flip” that I’m aware of was in 2017 when the Salvator Mundi by Leonardo da Vinci sold for $450M at Christie’s in NYC. That same painting was bought by two art dealers at an auction in New Orleans in 2005 for just $1,000. Recently this year, Sotheby’s sold a drawing by Andrea Mantegna for over $11M. That same drawing was last purchased at a small auction house in Germany for under $1,000. In January 2015, Sotheby’s sold an oil sketch by John Constable for $5.2M. Just 18 months before, that same painting was purchased at Christie's for just ~$5,200. The list goes on...
Now, compare those numbers to any other category that you might flip. What’s the most expensive sneaker you could possibly find, what’s the most expensive electronic you could possibly find, what’s the most expensive video game you could possibly find, etc. For me, it makes sense to focus on art given its potential relative to every other category that I could try to become an expert in.

Now onto the guide...
It is important to realize that buying and selling art is not too dissimilar from buying and selling anything else. You are still going to want to look in various places to source; you are still going to find similar comps that have sold; you are still going to consider condition, etc. There are obviously some important differences between art and your typical flipping categories, such as electronics, sports cards or sneakers, and I’ll get into those.
So let's start from the top...

Sourcing art is actually pretty similar to sourcing any other item you are used to flipping. This fact shouldn’t come as a surprise since art is just another object in people’s homes that they tend to sell along with everything else. I’ve bought art in nearly every venue you can think of - garage sales, estate sales, thrift stores, antique stores, eBay, local auctions, national auctions, online auctions, etc.
An important thing to consider with sourcing is your location. I happen to be based on the East Coast, which has numerous homes filled with art and antiques. If you are in a more sparsely populated area, you’ll probably look to do most of your sourcing online. Given the pandemic, I’ve also switched to sourcing most of my inventory online, primarily online auctions.
If you are on the East Coast, I like to use Auctionzip which does a pretty good job at displaying auctions in my area. If you don’t know how to find auctions in your area - Google is your best friend, just use basic keyword searches like "auctions near me", etc.

This is probably the area that trips people up the most. I think that this problem is two-fold: 1. People don’t know which resources to use and 2. People don’t know how to properly find similar comps.
When you want to find the going rate for an Xbox 360, for example, you will simply whip out your eBay app and search for recently sold listings. While this may work for some works of art, you’ll likely have to add several more resources to your arsenal. The three major resources you’ll want to use to find art price results are Liveauctioneers, Invaluable, and Google. Liveauctioneers and Invaluable are platforms that allow auction houses around the world to host online auctions. The reason they will be valuable to you is that they keep all of the results from past sales on their platform; Liveauctioneers provides all of their results for free, while Invaluable offers only recent results for free (usually results older than a year or two will have a paywall behind them). While Liveauctioneers and Invaluable are pretty great, sometimes the best tool to use is simply Google. There are many auction houses that have their own online platforms, so if you aren’t finding many good, recent comps on Liveauctioneers/Invaluable then Google may help you pick up on some results from independent auction platforms.
In terms of finding similar comps, there are really two types of art you have to consider:
The first type are prints, which could be lithographs, etchings, engravings, woodcuts, woodblocks, etc. Prints are made in multiple quantities, meaning there is a chance you could find a price result for an exact copy of the print that you are trying to value. If you can find a comp for an exact copy of the print you are trying to value then the only things you have to consider is the condition of the comp vs. the condition of the print at hand and how recently that comp sold.
The second type are unique works, which could include drawings, paintings, mixed media, etc. These are works that are 1 of 1, so you won’t be able to find an exact copy that has sold. Sometimes you’ll stumble across a previous result for the same work you are valuing, but oftentimes you’ll need to find “similar” comps to help you with valuation.
The most important things to consider when finding similar comps are medium, subject mattestyle, and size. The value of an artist’s work can value drastically depending on if it is a pencil sketch on paper vs. watercolor on paper vs. oil on canvas. In order to find accurate comps, you’ll want to first make sure they are the same medium. The second thing to look for is subject mattestyle. Some artists are known for a particular subject matter or style, which is worth much more than their other works. For example, a painting of sunflowers by Van Gogh is going to be worth much more than some random seascape by him. The third thing to consider when finding comps is size. You can use common sense here - if the most similar comp is twice the size then you can reduce the value of your work by about half. Other things to look out for when finding the most accurate comps are sale date, creation date, and quality. I won’t dive too deep into these (even though they are all important), but try your best to find the most recent comps that share the most in common with the unique work you are trying to value.

When it comes to buying art, you usually make money in one of three ways:
  1. You simply buy a correctly advertised piece for less than it is worth. This happens when the seller doesn’t know the true value or if the work is being sold in a marketplace that isn’t ideal for that particular work.
  2. You buy a work that isn’t correctly advertised. In this case, the seller may not know the artist, they may have misdescribed the work, certain important ownership history is missing, etc. In these cases you can apply a little bit of research and usually fill in the gaps and potentially score big.
  3. You buy a work that needs restoration, restore it, and then sell it for more. This requires that you know a local restorer who can affordably clean and restore a work of art for you. In general, works that have a dirty surface or a small hole can potentially be good buys since a minor cleaning/restoration will make them look 10x better.

Choosing where to sell a work usually comes down to personal preference. I tend to sell the majority of my inventory online using eBay. However, I also use my own website, a small physical gallery space, 1stDibs, Chairish, wholesale to other dealers, and auction houses. Most of those options are pretty straightforward.
One of the options that might be a little less obvious is consigning to auction houses. This is one of my favorite strategies since it requires barely any effort on my part. What I like to do is find a work that I can buy at one auction house for cheap (due to any of the reasons I listed under “Buying”) and then immediately give it to a more appropriate auction house to sell for me. The advantages of consigning to auction houses are that you can sell very expensive works with little risk and the auction house will take care of all the marketing/payment/logistics. The downsides are that the fees can be high and the timelines can be long (typically 3-6 months turnaround time).
If you are uncomfortable with the idea of shipping art because of its size or fragility or value, you can simply drop it off at your local UPS store or shipping/packaging place and have them do the packing for you.
TLDR, buy art for cheap and sell it for more.
In all seriousness, as mentioned please feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions or comment below. If you’re interested in becoming more involved in the art market, I’m also putting together a community for art enthusiasts and professionals - it will serve as a great free resource for anyone who is interested.
submitted by JMcCFineArt to Flipping [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 15:22 perchero [F2P] I drafted ZNR 15 times for 196.67 gems each time. In 10 more drafts I will have a full collection.

Hello everyone,
about a month after Zendikar Risings hit Arena I have drafted (PREMIER Draft) the set 15 times, so about once every other day. I am 3/4 through having the full zendikar expansion (and I could craft whole as of today). Here's how I did it, here are my results.
While I am no pro player, I do hit constructed Mythic every season and Limited Diamond. My overall winrate during this drafting challenge was 65,65% from silver2 to diamon4.
I am F2P which means I got to play all these games with gems and gold I saved during the month-and-a-half before zendikar and the gold and gems I have won since. You can play Arena for free. You can have all cards for free. It just takes time, so it is possible to have a full set and all tier decks after a few weeks, but not the day after expansion release; the same as paper magic.
The starting conditions were:
Starting Gold Starting Gems Starting Date
42,325 7725 September 18
I have so far 100 znr packs and I am sitting at:
Gold t2 Gems t2 Date t2
13,175 13,805 October 22
My testing shows that 150 packs are enough for a full set and I stand by the claim that drafting is the best way to acquire said packs, as well as the key to a full collection. I have played 15 drafts for less than 200 gems each (196.667), and so can you.
I have so far NOT bought the Mastery Pass, and this time around I am considering not buying it, since all non-zendikar packs are just vault proggression for me and I have no interest in cosmetics, but I still need to do the math. 99% of the time the Mastery Pass is WORTH MORE than you pay for it. I am not enjoying ZNR as much as previous draft formats so that draft token loses a bit of value to me.
Finally, the data:
Score Colors Archetype
7-1 BR Party
4-3 WR Aggro
2-3 WB Party
7-2 WR Party
7-0 WB Party
7-2 RG Landfall
6-3 WR Aggro
2-3 UG Kicker
7-2 Wu Party
1-3 UB Rogues
1-3 WR Midrange
3-3 UR Wizards
0-3 UR Party
7-0 UB Rogues
4-3 WR Warriors
Playlist to all the videos here. The 7-0 video with Rogues is coming soon.
Wins Losses Total Games
65 34 99

Color # %
W 8 53%
U 6 40%
B 5 33%
R 9 60%
G 2 13%
WU 1 7%
UB 2 13%
BR 1 7%
RG 1 7%
WG 0 0
WB 2 13%
BG 0 0%
UG 1 7%
UR 2 13%
WR 5 33%
As you see, I have drafted W and R much more often than any other color or color combination. I think I undervalue black clerics and the cleric archetype as a whole since it is supposed to be one of the strongest. I also have drafted Green very sparingly. UG kicker feels too slow in a tempo heavy format with few ways to stabilize and BG is just bad imo. Red's preponderance lays in its fantastic common [[Roiling Eruption]] that comes to no surprise but also to [[Grotag Bug-Catcher]] and [[Expedition Champion]]. The champion I feel is still going under the radar for most people, in my experience it has been amazing, almost always a 3mana 4/3.
The reason as for why I draft white so much deserves its own title:

[[Sheperd of Heroes]]

Why is this card fantastic:
Zendikar Rising is a tempo oriented format. That doesnt mean that it HAS to be aggressive, but that it TENDS to be. You can find yourself trading attacks with the opponent everytime, each player getting lower and lower until a boardstale happens, someone has to start chumping while their uncontested flyer still threatens the opponent. Why do I say this? Because cards that can recoup tempo are very very strong.
Sheperd is one such card, at 5 mana it is rather expensive, but gaining ~4 life and having 4 toughness to dodge eruption and flying means, you just started winning a losing game. I cannot stress enough how powerful this card is. Playing a 2 or 3 in a row feels nigh unbeatable. In the same vein I feel that [[Turntimber Ascetic]] deserves a second look.
Other "sleeper" cards that I have found way better than expected are:
[[Akoum Hellhound]], [[Malakir Blood-Priest]], [[Stonework Packbeast]], [[Ardent Electromancer]], [[Canopy Baloth]], [[Farsight Adept]], [[Joraga Visionary]], [[Kazandu Stomper]], [[Kabira Outrider]] and [[Kor Celebrant]]. [[Skyclave Shade]] is also SO much better than it looks.
[[Thwart the Grave]] is mythic uncommon IMO. Plays in the same league as [[Zenith Flare]] or just barely bellow it.
All in all, I think the set is very tempo oriented. Green feels lackluster, while White and Red have strong cards at common. The Rogues deck can be brutal and the crab is dirty. Party as a mechanic is fantastic and very fun and leads to interesting choices in both drafting and playing, but you already knew that.
Thanks for reading and I hope you find my results interesting.
TLDR: I am F2P and I played 15 znr drafts for dirty cheap, you can too. Here are my results and some thoughts.
submitted by perchero to MagicArena [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 15:13 perchero [Draft] I drafted ZNR 15 times, here are the results

Hi fellow spikes,
about a month after Zendikar Risings hit Arena I have drafted the set 15 times (very shy from my 40 times in 3 weeks of m21 but life has gotten in the way of magic), so about once every other day. Here are my results.
While I am no pro player, I do hit constructed Mythic every season and Limited Diamond. My overall winrate during this drafting madness was 65,65% from silver2 to diamon4.
I am F2P which means I got to play all these games with gems and gold I saved during the month-and-a-half before zendikar and the gold and gems I have won since. You can play Arena for free. You can have all cards for free. It just takes time, so it is possible to have a full set and all tier decks after a few weeks, but not the day after expansion release; the same as paper magic.
The starting conditions were:
Starting Gold Starting Gems Starting Date
42,325 7725 September 18
I have so far 100 znr packs and I am sitting at:
Gold t2 Gems t2 Date t2
13,175 13,805 October 22
As you see, I have played 15 drafts for less than 200 gems each (196.667), it has been a good run so far.
I have so far NOT bought the Mastery Pass, and this time around I am considering not buying it, since all non-zendikar packs are just vault proggression for me and I have no interest in cosmetics, but I still need to do the math.
Finally, the data:
Score Colors Archetype
7-1 BR Party
4-3 WR Aggro
2-3 WB Party
7-2 WR Party
7-0 WB Party
7-2 RG Landfall
6-3 WR Aggro
2-3 UG Kicker
7-2 Wu Party
1-3 UB Rogues
1-3 WR Midrange
3-3 UR Wizards
0-3 UR Party
7-0 UB Rogues
4-3 WR Warriors
Playlist to all the videos here. 7-0 with Rogues coming soon.
Wins Losses Total Games
65 34 99

Color # %
W 8 53%
U 6 40%
B 5 33%
R 9 60%
G 2 13%
WU 1 7%
UB 2 13%
BR 1 7%
RG 1 7%
WG 0 0
WB 2 13%
BG 0 0%
UG 1 7%
UR 2 13%
WR 5 33%
As you see, I have drafted W and R much more often than any other color or color combination. I think I undervalue black clerics and the cleric archetype as a whole since it is supposed to be one of the strongest. I also have drafted Green very sparingly. UG kicker feels too slow in a tempo heavy format with few ways to stabilize and BG is just bad imo. Red's preponderance lays in its fantastic common [[Roiling Eruption]] that comes to no surprise but also to [[Grotag Bug-Catcher]] and [[Expedition Champion]]. The champion I feel is still going under the radar for most people, in my experience it has been amazing, almost always a 3mana 4/3.
The reason as for why I draft white so much deserves its own title:

[[Sheperd of Heroes]]

Why is this card fantastic:
Zendikar Rising is a tempo oriented format. That doesnt mean that it HAS to be aggressive, but that it TENDS to be. You can find yourself trading attacks with the opponent everytime, each player getting lower and lower until a boardstale happens, someone has to start chumping while their uncontested flyer still threatens the opponent. Why do I say this? Because cards that can recoup tempo are very very strong.
Sheperd is one such card, at 5 mana it is rather expensive, but gaining ~4 life and having 4 toughness to dodge eruption and flying means, you just started winning a losing game. I cannot stress enough how powerful this card is. Playing a 2 or 3 in a row feels nigh unbeatable. In the same vein I feel that [[Turntimber Ascetic]] deserves a second look.
Other "sleeper" cards that I have found way better than expected are:
[[Akoum Hellhound]], [[Malakir Blood-Priest]], [[Stonework Packbeast]], [[Ardent Electromancer]], [[Canopy Baloth]], [[Farsight Adept]], [[Joraga Visionary]], [[Kazandu Stomper]], [[Kabira Outrider]] and [[Kor Celebrant]]. [[Skyclave Shade]] is also SO much better than it looks.
[[Thwart the Grave]] is mythic uncommon IMO. Plays in the same league as [[Zenith Flare]] or just barely bellow it.
All in all, I think the set is very tempo oriented. Green feels lackluster, while White and Red have strong cards at common. The Rogues deck can be brutal and the crab is dirty. Party as a mechanic is fantastic and very fun and leads to interesting choices in both drafting and playing, but you already knew that.
Thanks for reading and I hope you find my results interesting.
TLDR: Played 15 znr drafts and here are my results and some thoughts.
submitted by perchero to spikes [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 15:00 jg429 Sub Basement Noise

Sub-Basement Noise is our daily thread for off-topic content and ATL content that doesn't really need its own thread.
Basement Noise Virtual Shows Have Been Announced!
Basement Noise Megathread
Dates: 10/9 (WUS), 10/23 (Rian's set), 11/13 (Alex's set), 12/4 (Zack's set), 12/18 (Jack's set)
Streams are $15 each and there is a variety of merch packages to choose from
Make sure you are up-to-date on our piracy rule before the shows air
Wake Up, Sunshine post-stream discussion
Rian's Set Pre-Stream Discussion
Nothing Personal Survivor Round 1
Hot Takes: Fan club is useless
Dirty Work Survivor: Results
All Song Survivor: Round 19
Off-Topic Thread: Halloween!
Face Art Merch Contest Voting: Vote Here!
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2020.10.22 14:58 coldworlds I think my gf is cheating on me..

Okay im gonna try and be quick and short me and my new gf started dating a few months ago.. Aug 17th to be exact. When we finally agreed to date i changed my relationship status on FB and she immediately freaked out saying she don't like to post her business out there for everyone to see.. Yet her past relationship she did. She has a few facebooks that she said she forgot the pw to which i think is a small red flag because i also have like 5 accounts i cant get into.
As we moved on a few months its been really eating at me about the whole she wont post our relationship update so i said i dont feel comfortable and i asked why she said because of her past bf i asked her well why dont u post a relationship status anymore she said because my ex slept w my friends. I said.. What??? Howa that even make sense and she said well theres other reasons i said why she said i dont wanna talk about it.
Also she has a picture w another guy on her fb but wont post pictures of us its just all confusing and stressful i have trust issues ive been hurt so many times and have this thing that attracts ppl who use and cheat on me. Im a good man i provide for her i fix her coffee and medicine and have it ready before she gets out of bed i drive her to work when she needs rides fix her vehicle i spend time w her daughter as she doesn't have a positive role model or father figure in her life
I fix her lunch every morning and when she gets off i make dinner and rub her feet i go out of my way to make sure she is happy and content yet i just feel like im putting in 100 and shes putting in 20.
Im constantly worrying i see tons of red flags but im lonely and so sick of the search for a soul mate i just want someone to love me for who i am and wants to be my best friend in life.
Okay i have to add a few more red flags... She has this older guy friend that she told me about she said hes been stalking her for years and he blows her phone up constantly one day i was messin w her sayin i seen her car at his house (i was bluffing) she insisted she wasnt there and drove up there as she had thought he was workin.. Well guess what the old man was there
I confronted him he said theyve been together for four years and blah blah blah she kept cutting him off sayin WE HAVE NOT!! Insisted he was a liar and trying to destroy our relationship and this is the reason she hasnt put her status up and one day we traded phones as a trust test and she gave me hers and her text were open well i close out n goto her fb messages only to see a text from some guy that flirted w her sayin some really dirty things all he did was reply her number like wtf anyway she snatched her phone out my hands n left before i seen anything else
I tried to tell her look pls dont hurt me i cant deal w anothrr heartbreak and if shes playin any games that we can just be friends id still give her everything i do n have now foe her but insist nothings goin on and everything is okay and im just over reacting.. Can anyone please give me some advice on how to go about this if this happened to u what would u do? How would you feel?? By the way i will show her yalls comments afterwards because she swears im just in my head and theres no need to be sus. Thank you Reddit
submitted by coldworlds to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 12:01 VeYsooo a loser who became a winner and loved the first time, but got destroyed inside very soon.

Hey guys, what Im gonna write down here will be not in a perfect english and maybe a bit long. But I will give my best for you to understand me. It would make me really really happy if someone actually takes time to read my story and shares his thoughts about it. I feel like I just need people to talk right now but im also scared the lenght of my text will scare the most of you away. Its about me, my 180 turn in life and my ex girlfriend Ive just met this year. I just cant recover from that and need advice even it was a very short relationship. I will try to make you understand my personality and my past (that is what will take the most time to write down), so maybe you can understand why my situation is so diffcult for me, which would may be a childsplay for others to handle. You can skip my past stuff if you want to make it quick to, I will mark my past part.
(My teenage with girls)
Im beginning at my teenage. Ive always been the shy loser type of guy. Talking to women was always problematic. I had a bestfriend in the age of 18. I found her very attractive. She was once very drunk and wanted to kiss me, but I was a coward. I felt kinda in love with girls here and there, but always let them go very fast because those girls werent interested in me at all. I was the video gamer type of guy. Knowledge about games on mass, but zero knowledge about girls. I always seeked for a girlfriend, but women were just too difficult for me. In my life falling in love meant always pain. It seemed always very easy for my friends. So, I made myself something like tinder back then. Wrote millions of women, got rejected by trillions but a few girls answered my request. I was not that good at taking selfies, so the women who answered were the "lower tier" on that platform. Not only by looking, but they also had a huge crack in their heads. I knew Im not the most attractive guy out there (I knew I cant play in the high tier), so I gave it a chance.
(First time almost slept with a girl)
From like 12 dates, 11 gone completely uncomfortable were I needed an excuse to just get out and there. I remember one of those girls coming in sports wearing right after her soccergame. She was sweaty, smelled nasty and we dated in the middle and most crowded place in our city!. But there was 1 date with a very naughty girl. She wasnt a beauty, but she went straight at me, kissed me and I just were like "Okay, whats happening here?!". After 1 hour of kissing ( and me thinking about my kissing skills ) she pulled me to her bed. We almost slept together but my little friend gave up on me. It was a very uncomfortable situation for me. I could have end my virginity there, but my boi just didnt wanted to work because of the nervousness. I gone home and couldnt even talk to her anymore, of course she got mad. But I didnt fall in love with her. For me it was all too fast and not expected.
(Giving up on myself and the girls)
Well at some point around age 19, I gave up on me and the search of a girlfriend. Ive became a 100% videogamer. Just turned on league of Legends, played all day long not giving a damn about the world. 3 years past, Ive became fat, I hated my job more and more and just spend a look into the mirror. Man, I really let myself go. What I saw was me in the most ugliest version possible. Fat, no visible jaw line, balding, skin looked sick, no future plans, sad look in the face. I watched some young influencers driving my most favourite car. I knew, I want this car... and not in the age of 60.
(180 turn, loser becomes winner)
I made the biggest step in my life. I learned pretty much about ecommerce in just 1 year, opened my own online shop, it blew up in a just 2 years. In that 3 years I also hit the gym, made a diet, used beard grow kits, got a testosterone replacement therapy because mine T sucked, made small plastic surgerys in my face ( flatten nose, stronger jawline ) got a hair transplant in turkey, my skin looked healthier and I fixed my teeth.....and I finally looked with proud in the mirror. That fat video gamer with trash-job became a attractive rich man. They say I look like the sucessfull younger brother compared to my old photos where Im actually younger on. Im was still not a guy girls falling in love for on the first sight, but I guess I started to look decent/good in the world of women.
(New lifestyle, new me)
Guess what, I bought that car. I finally, after 4 years of grinding, bought that 150.000$ car I was dreaming of 4 years ago as a videogamer. It wasnt easy, I dont want to give you the impression like it was luck or its an easy task to make an online shop that popular. I really grinded the sh** out. Well I stopped to grind, things were going well. The shop didnt needed me anymore to work. Just had to look into some paperwork 2-3 hours a day. Everything else my employed sister would take care of. Now I enjoyed life. Me, my car, my money. Nothing else mattered. I still didnt searched for any women. And I want to you to know, that in my case, there are no golddiggers fighting for me. I somehow dont pull tons of girls, even tho with an expensive car and much money. Im living kinda undercover tho. Its not always like money makes you a playboy. Love became even less important and almost unimaginable for me after all those years as a single. I really couldnt imagine a life with a girlfriend. You just cant. You feel like its not made for you. Sleeping together, waking up together.. those thoughts were kinda alien to me.
( the girl who is about to spin my whole mind )
Now all this happening this year. Its spring and Im always the kind of guy who wakes up from winter sleep and becomes a burning flame in spring. I love spring, and thats also the time where my hormones going crazy. She just added me on instagram. A girl with one of the most beautiful smiles Ive seen. I knew her, she was the sister of a coworker back in time, but ive never met her in person. First it started with reacting to storys, then we chatted. She was one of the few girls whom it was very easy to chat. Very comfortable. Always knew what to answer, she always helped the conversation going on. Nothing compared to those trash conversations back then on dating platforms.
( my first real comfortable dates )
My whole life I had very uncomfortable dates. I saw her the first time, felt comfortable and enjoyed the time with her. Not felt anything yet, we drove with scooters along the river. Was very cool and kinda romantic. After driving her to her home I was like "wow, 8 hours? When did they passed? How did that happen?". Trust me my dates before I was almost counting the minutes to piss off. It was very easy to talk to her. The second date I was at her home. Very sweet little appartment. We watched TV, but I wasnt able to get closer to her. But there was one thing tho, this new alien feeling getting up my guts. Those butterflies. Her smile everything, it just made something tickle down there. I went home and said "I guess I really like her".
( first real Kiss )
In the next 2 weeks I felt like a teenager who just discovered love. I took her hand, it was a warm awesome sunset and pulled her through the forest around my neighbourhood on scooters. She had inliners and Ive pulled her on my E-scooter by hand. I cant describe how happy I felt. I was alone my whole life and now Im showing something of myself to someone I really adore. The good part is, she was really cool with me being an absolute beginner at the age of 26. taking my time to kiss her. So she told to me in a very sweet way, that I can hold her hand whenever I want, not only to pulling her on scates. Seemed like she also was very enjoying the time with me. I felt like a little kid. The butterflies went crazy. The fourth day I was ready to kuddle and finally kiss her. Man it was really something else. Over 20 years of no love Ive finally made it. Kissing someone who I really felt in love with. The kiss with that one girl back then was nothing compared to this kiss. We couldnt let go of us. She had to work early in the morning, but we kissed hours into the night.
(Like a drug, the rush beginns)
Well at this point I was going straight to 100% with her. I met her friends, her city and the wonderfull places, her mother, got used to her more and more and also felt in love with her deeper and deeper. I stayed 3 days a week at her home (she not at mine, because yea, I still live with my parents and supporting them financially. Was waiting for working relationship to move out and not being alone). Ive invited her to a short beach vacation over the weekend. This was the peak of this relationship. There was again this one song playing in her musicbox. A lovesong which just came out since we were meeting. This song always played in the background since I met her and became OUR song. Imagine just a guy, never felt love for over 20 years is now next to a person who he was like searching for his whole life. A girl who came out of nowhere and deciced to be on your side. This song plays, we kuddle at the beach, beautiful sunset, birds passing by and her hands going through my hair. I just closed my eyes and felt like im blessed by god. This was like heroin. This was what I really missed my whole life. I could tear up to how great I felt. Just a perfect moment where you really miss anything. We also had great time in bed together at that vacation, even tho Im a beginner.
(Ive fcked up)
Now the bad part comes. I was like addicted to her. I was thinking 24/7 about her. I wasnt myself anymore. I started to get jelous because she were still friends with her first love and was texting almost everyday. Then I said something that I really dont supposed to say. We were talking about her diet, she really wasnt fat but she still felt uncomfortable with her weight. I really meant it as an motivation and said something like "yea I could imagine that you would look even hotter with 3-4 kilos lighter" with heartsmileys and all. She took it as an assault and cried. I really didnt mean it. I wanted to give her some kind of motivation. I would never want her to chance. I was so freakin in love with her, that I wouldnt ever change her. She was perfect for me. But she didnt wanted to understand that. It seemed okay for a week and then, after 6 beautiful weeks with her, she left me via chat. Now I felt like a very huge card house collapsing. All my self esteem ive built up, all my everything just died in front of my eyes. The old weak me came back. I cried all day long. I was like an heroin addict who just got addicted and had to go cold turkey. She ripped apart my heart. She wanted to stay friends, twisted my mind for weeks and months, somedays even flirtet with me just to let me fall again. I felt like trash.
Its been months now! It was summer when she left me. Its being colder and I get in some kind of winter depression. Even tho I hit the gym, meet friends and do stuff... Im always dead inside, my hope of a girl coming out of nowhere like her and making me happy is almost at zero. I wanted to kuddle with her in winter, kiss her on new year but maybe she will already do it with a new guy. It still breaks my heart. I can still hear our love song very quietly playing in my head, wishing her to just sms me and tell me, that she misses me. But she blocked me eveywhere. I feel so guilty. Everything I wanted was to love her and be with her. I noticed how my taste in music changed to more dramatic and sad music. I cant stop thinking about her. Ive met a new girl and could totally not do anything with her. It was a cold day, I hate the cold and I started to compare her with my ex from boots to her head. I feel like a part of me will always love her, because she just slapped our book close without even trying it. Without even giving me a real chance to give her all I got. I just dont know what to do with my life now. I have everything, except her, and she was everything I wanted. My first time loving wasted like that. Im already more scared than ever before from love. Because again love made me bleed. Love made me feel sick. This time it really played a very dirty game on me. Pulled me in to kick me in my back without any defense. I really wish I had a timemachine. Not only to fix my faults, but to live those blessed moments with her once again. I want the spring back, I want the warm days back, I want her back. I dont want to be all alone for the coming winter again. I sometimes still get teary eyes. My spirit is completely broken. Time is passing but this feeling of failure wont went off. Im totally negative with myself. My first girl ever left me that fast, I must be a terrible boyfriend. I feel sick. I feel like something very important is missing in my life now.
How can I get rid of this feeling? Im scared about my future dates. Im scared that those dates wont be as romantic as with her and the anxiety I wont be able to love again because I once again got dissapointed. I just want someone to pull me out of these dark clouds surrounding me for months and show me the sunshine. Its so pathetic. 6 weeks of relationsship and it hits me that hard. Instead of being happy to made any progress and experience, I cry like a baby... she follows me sometimes in my dreams. I wake up and feel totally weird all day long when this happens. No, I just CANT let go. I invested all my holden back love in her. I felt too deep in love. Enjoyed her kisses and being with her toooo much. It sucks now to being single :(
submitted by VeYsooo to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 08:00 Bigbluebuttonman Red Blood

Ever since humanity had entered the fold of The Galactic Alliance (GA) in 3071, human years, tensions had unfolded. In the first talks that had taken place between The Federation and the representatives of The Galactic Council (GC), the human diplomats had always been accompanied by certain advisors, quiet and stoic, saying nothing most of the time.
The talks were typical for interactions between the GC and prospective members, but these advisors, silent watchers, would always walk up and whisper something in the ears of the human diplomats that couldn’t be heard or understood by the GC.
When pressed by the council, the diplomats replied, “Just keeping us up to date on defense and security.” Nonchalance on the matter only made interactions fuzzier. However, there was no outward aggression or other indication that humanity would be a problem. Human diplomats were just peculiar. So, the GC let humanity in.
Outside of the secrecy, the humans were perceived as an above-average species. Space travel was sub-par with faster than light (FTL) engines reaching half of the standard performance and a fourth of the top engines.
Infrastructure was in the middle of the road. The technological level was above average for the species upon entering. Their mathematics had catching up to do.
Biology didn’t seem to be on their side. They were fleshy, not hard-skinned, and not very nimble. They couldn’t climb surfaces very quickly or climb very many of them. Strength was lacking, mobility was lacking. Human immune systems were weak.
Outside of these impressions, the rumor mill spun up about secretive aspects of The Federation. On the fringes, conspiracy theories of plans to attack the GA or subvert it abounded. These theories and other skepticisms merely continued the more the GA’s citizens got hints and whiffs of The Federation’s system of governance.
“Contingency plans.”
“Need-to-know basis.”
Federation diplomats continuously put on the smiley face every time their secrecy came into question. GA citizens could never tell if they were truly genuine but most hoped for sincerity on the part of the diplomats and granted the benefit of the doubt in the end. Overall, the alien species found little reason to be afraid of humans on the surface, other than the curiosities.
Shortly following membership status, about a month’s time, the exchange of peoples began. Humans would visit the alien worlds and aliens would visit the human worlds. Handshakes would be made...where possible. Tourists would gaze upon cultural wonders. As the early interactions with humans continued, affairs did not go without incident. Accidents happened. Sometimes a human would cut themselves within the sights of others. Usually while making food or while running around in a drunken stupor.
Accounts circulated into the galactic press and the rumor mill went to town. Old legends and myths were called up. Eventually, it was confirmed.
Yes, they had red blood. Crimson red. No previous civilized species in the known galactic worlds had it, and those worlds that did were inhabited only by primitive species that hadn’t yet reached the full range of sentience that the developed member states did...their trait reserved for only the most ferocious of worlds.
The GA had experience with red-blooded worlds, where the majority of the species bled red. Horror stories of explorers and even gaggles of armed mercenaries getting lost in these worlds and never coming back were common. The vicious sights and creatures of these worlds haunted GA member constituencies. Myth and legend abounded about why red-blood species differed this way. If one wanted to sit around the campfire and scare friends, just tell a story or two about red-blooded monsters. While a civilization had not yet developed out of these worlds whose beings bled crimson, they were theorized. The hypotheticals were never pretty to GA constituencies, especially so with myth and legend to fuel the fear. A red-blooded, developed society became the ultimate bogeyman to many of the GA worlds.
Most species had a collective freak-out, instantly connecting the secretive behavior of the diplomats to blood, although they could not justify any connection beyond their own suspicions.
Demands came to bar the humans from the alliance, cut off all trade relations, block space travel beyond a specified no-go zone, and leave them to skulk in their own little space room. In essence, the galactic equivalent of being grounded.
Some species, however, proposed more extreme “preventative measures.”
Interventionist proposals from these member states included total subjugation or mass deportation. Sterilization and mass killing were demanded by the harshest of individuals, largely the rantings of rabid thinkers with influence. Get them while they’re weaker.
The GC insisted on reigning in the behaviors of increasingly rogue powers, seeking to contain the humans but avoid an unnecessary war. It did no good. By the time any real move was made to restore order and deliberate on official policy, ships were already entering into human space.
The Galactic Council was convinced the humans would lose. Too unwilling to plunge the GA into civil war and too prejudiced against humanity, they made no further actions to stop the rogues.
Upon arrival at Yaris-6, a human colony world, the humans were initially confused until the ships fired upon the planet’s metropolitan areas. Defenses fired back and were silenced in response. The ships landed, unloaded their troops, and massacred a population of tens of millions in a matter of weeks.
Moments after the first shots had been fired, an emergency communication system using the principles of quantum entanglement immediately alerted all other human colonies and homeworlds. The network was little good for anything other than the galactic equivalent of morse code but sufficient for the task of instantly updating the whole of The Federation. And so, “contingency plans” were put into motion.
The invading alien force started with five human colonies, striking Yaris-6 first and attacking the rest in succession. With all human colonies alerted to the nature of the attack, affairs ground to a halt on the subsequent targets. Once orbiting fleets blasted anti-space defenses into the dirt, the ensuing ground troops found themselves bogged down, the invasion reduced to a snail’s pace.
Far more humans were armed than during the first colony massacre, making every square meter a battle, no matter the location. For every five humans killed, one of theirs went, but there were always more humans around the corner. Combat was slow, tedious, and brutal. Humans didn’t fight fair. Guerrillas would sneak behind lines under any cover they could, and detonate themselves with explosives, or commit other butcheries on the enemy where possible. It was easy to do so after Yaris-6. Even though the task force had sought to destroy much of the industries in the orbital attack, the numbers of weapons, small, medium, or heavy, that the defenders still brought to bear were shocking and unprecedented compared to the expectations of the alien fleet with the first encounter in mind.
It was taking months to clear any city. Space affairs were not quiet in the meantime. Occasionally, a few ships would interject into the affair. Not large but hard to hit, very nimble. They tended to poke holes in large battleships and attempt to discharge “deck clearers” into them like a poison dart injecting its dose. The attacks were mostly failures. The ships were not well-acquainted with the arsenal of the alien fleets and could only guess where to poke a hole to force in breaching forces. But one such attack eventually yielded success.
Too preoccupied with the ground war to deal with the “gnats,” the fleet commanders didn’t notice when one of their smaller ships disappeared not with an explosion but with the flash of FTL engines.
A year into the invasion, the fleets obligated to just bombard the remaining strongholds for a few months straight, even if it left survivors for later disposal, and move on to the next systems on their checklists.
When the fleets arrived at dedicated homeworld systems, the war was over. Homeworlds were surrounded by a gigantic swarm of ships and further aided by equally vast defensive installations. Superiority in arms was not enough to win the day. One hasty exchange of blows later, the alien fleets retreated, but not before losing most of their numbers.
Upon returning, the rogue nations began preparing for the inevitable, scared witless by the last battle, building up the fleets they could with their existing industrial war capacity and preparing for an invasion.
For years, it never came. There were reports of activity here and there, of ships quickly blipping in and out, before disappearing back into the void. No doubt the rogue nations figured it was a scouting activity but could never ascertain what they really knew and how it would factor into the impending invasion.
Finally, the hammer fell, and the human fleets pierced the territories of the rogue GA members with blistering speed. Federation fleets were jumping between systems faster than any other GA fleet could, leaving battered systems behind. Any possible ground defense, space installation, or other logistical military assets, were hit with extraordinary force the moment fleets entered a system. The most that would be reported of these encounters were of large fleets blipping in and swiftly unloading cargoes on priority targets that were already picked out in advance.
Every alien ship met a different fate. Sometimes swarms of small fighters ate away at the ship defenses, leaving it open to heavy artillery from the main fleet’s support ships. Sometimes breaching crews would do the dirty work, perfected from previous experience, even commandeering some ships and turning them against the enemy. Other times, straight ship-to-ship combat ensued, with battleships and battlecruisers exchanging blows directly.
The rogue nations surrendered in short order, two months into the counter-invasion, in 3075. Afterward, The Galactic Council asked The Federation for leniency, to heal open wounds and mend broken relationships. Such sentiments were not genuine desires for clemency; they only wanted the closest thing to the status quo of 3070.
The Federation ignored them.
Most aliens on the occupied planets were killed within the span of two years, with only a very select few taken in for “scientific analysis.” With worlds swept of alien life, the humans plundered everything else of value from the worlds following the purge, whether the remnants of an entire civilization’s history, culture, and technology, or planetary resources to feed the industrial bloodline of humanity.
Responding to the horrified GC’s “babbling,” one human diplomat gruffly replied...
”Did you wail and scream this much when you left us all to die?”
In the developing decades, the alliance members, what was left of them, found themselves ruthlessly strong-armed.
“You can’t go there.”
“You must pay this much money.”
“We want five ships to be allowed to patrol these worlds.”
And many more demands aside. Every time, the alliance acquiesced. What could they do when a massacre was the alternative?
By 3200, the GA could hardly consider itself anything more than a vassal state. While their power was whittled away, they had decades of time to grieve their status as a fallen empire. Decades of time to lament the fate of the GC’s subjugation. Decades of time to rage at the laws pushed on its constituents.
Decades of time to reflect.
If there was one benefit in the aftermath of the war, the scholars and intellectuals of the GA had plenty of opportunities to research why they lost. Investigative efforts were made easier by collaboration with a human society that was both all too willing to brag about its history and all too eager to figure out what supposedly made their blood so vile as to justify the unprovoked invasion.
Humanity spent every waking moment of its life embroiled in war...with itself. It was practically a pass time.
The natural consequence of red blood.
Why the fluid made species more volatile and brutal still wasn’t quite understood by humanity or the subjugated territories, just that it did.
Regular worlds in the alien territories were considered “pastoral" and "tame" by the standards of the humans' birth world, Earth. As much as humans found themselves bewildered at how any life on these worlds developed into civilizations, the other species were equally bewildered at them. Humans found such worlds, from their perspective, too conducive to a genetic complacency. The GA found red-blooded worlds too chaotic and prone to harming genetic progress more than helping.
Regardless, the difference between the evolutionary paths was the difference between calm rivers and raging oceans.
GA’s species developed “gracefully” by comparison. Humanity developed as viciously as the world before lived and breathed. In a constant state of perpetual war. First against nature, then with itself. War ebbed and flowed but never stopped. Not until the discovery of tangible evidence for the existence of alien life.
Every facet of the human experience could be traced back, in one way or another, to the drive to survive against the competition, from other animals, the elements, or themselves. No other member species of the GA endured this prior to membership.
Consequently, in every way besides the technological disparity between the GA and The Federation upon first contact, humanity was overwhelmingly better at war. The collective experience and almost ceaseless pool of knowledge around humanity’s wars granted The Federation adaptability in war that no other species had, tactically and strategically, using any means available.
In the arc of development, human nations eventually always had plans on the stand-by. They needed to, just in case.
Another result of constant war-making was the weaponization of the entire society. The ultimate manifestation of war. Every element of civilization dedicated to victory. Any sacrifice allowed. All barriers removed. When death was the only alternative, and the population was cornered, nothing was off the table. A situation repeated multiple times in human history and not once in the GA’s.
The Federation in 3071 thus held expertise in immediately shifting its civilization’s assets to a war footing in a short time span and in accordance with any battle plans on hand. Humans wrote the plans with any knowledge possible that indicated the potential attacks that could likely occur and how they would unfold. If any specifics were difficult, they wrote up a set of hypotheticals and the signs to indicate which one was the most likely strategy employed by a potential invading enemy at the outbreak.
When the first alien ships struck, one such plan was chosen, informing all colony worlds to follow the plan’s outlines with haste. Logistical operations shifted in concert. The human predictions ranged from an invading force going planet to planet destroying the surfaces with impunity to almost entirely engaging on the ground. The invaders’ strategy was somewhere in the middle, an extension of GA forces’ existing tactical doctrines.
During the life span of the GA constituent species, space versions of naval warfare and island-hopping strategies and tactics developed; bombard to soften hard targets, land troops to conquer the territory, a game that humanity had already played and perfected. GA worlds kept military and civilian affairs generally separate, in peacetime or not, along with militaries maintained at relatively small size proportional to the whole population. Once it was clear someone was going to lose, the other side surrendered and submitted to the terms and conditions.
GA species were not unfamiliar with the concept of annihilating worlds. They had the means to create weapons to do so, they just didn’t want to. They didn’t wish to engage with even the remote possibility of Mutually Assured Destruction; it was madness to them. Some weapons were perceived as too dangerous to be wielded by any species. Very few weapons of mass destruction left the drawing board; none deployed or even used. That, and ruthlessly glassing worlds might forego other financially exploitive opportunities.
Altogether, GA worlds engaged in little more than the human equivalent of skirmishes on a galactic scale.
Because they couldn’t stomach doing anything else.
They all implicitly agreed they’d rather not flood their worlds with traumatized veterans, subject their own civilian populations to untold horrors as a matter of course, or endure the social consequences of fully militarizing society, let alone face existential risks. No member constituency cared about what other societies had to deal with, just what they would deal with, and all the board moves were made accordingly.
Humanity could stomach far more sacrifices. Especially when cornered.
The GA lacked any extensive plans particular to the human context by the time the invasion began. The rogues simply took their existing militaries and threw it at the humans in a paranoid, schizophrenic gut reaction...a strategy ripe for exploitation.
Federation industry went into overtime producing weapons and ships to post-pone the invaders, coupled with appropriate tactics. In the long run, any attempt to appropriate technology was used, landing humanity a top-grade FTL engine during the war. And while the enemy was held at bay, humanity was producing a wall of steel across its worlds to consolidate itself at the frontline and eventually clog the invasion when it hit this wall and flush it out of humanity’s system.
The final defense force against the initial alien invasion was in fact crudely drawn up, something revealed to the GA remains decades into the post-war years. With the pace of the invasion force, humanity couldn’t make any ship or weapon more advanced than the enemy’s weapons, but they could make far more of them. After all, The Federation merely needed to get the enemy off their territory to allow itself breathing room and time to build a proper force for a counter-invasion.
With appropriated technology, humanity did. In less than a decade, the GA’s rogue nations paid the price for their actions.
Now humanity owns the Milky Way. If the Galactic Alliance could, they would have fled to the Andromeda by now, maybe warn others of the threat. They cannot, however, for when they wake up from the dream of a galaxy without humans, their eyes open to meet the endless fleets of battlecruisers hovering above each and every one of their worlds.
Wrote this story for an e-community's writing contest on a discord server. Figured it fit with the theme, so I tweaked it a bit and decided to put it here. Hope everyone enjoys it, this is my first submission to the subreddit that I've spent a good time following and enjoying.
submitted by Bigbluebuttonman to HFY [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 07:09 urutututu My boyfriend has incredibly low self esteem and it's pushing us further apart.

I want to start off by saying my boyfriend is Japanese living in Japan, and I am half and I am currently overseas for school and am not sure when I can go due to the current climate. I have also never gone for therapy in Japan, so I don't know what it's like. I have spent most of my life in North America. I have asked him to try it out, but he never really acknowledges my asking about it, and I cannot force him to go. Things that were said between us may have a little bit of a different nuance because our original conversations were in Japanese.
My boyfriend is 18 years old. I am 20F. We've been dating for 175 days (we both installed phone apps that count the days, he installed it first and showed it to me). He is a student, and he works long hours at as many part time jobs as he can get because he recently had health problems and spent a lot of money. He has savings, but he doesn't want to dig into them because he wants to move out soon. I am an illustrator and play games, so recently I made a twitter account to post art and talk to my game friends.
Recently, he's been getting very distant and replying less and less. We are long distance at the moment and I am unable to meet him. To keep a long story short, I got upset and confronted him about it. He ended up telling me that he has tendonitis in both wrists due to his part time job, and he didn't want to talk to me after I told him I made the twitter account. I didn't want him to feel like I was hiding something from him by not telling him and I have nothing to hide so I told him the account if he wants to see it.
I didn’t know it would upset him, and I asked him why he was upset. He gave me a kind of strange reason, and now I realize that he probably felt bad because he was really excited about buying a PC for both work and gaming, and now he had to quit his job, and he didn’t have the money for his computer, and his tendonitis makes it difficult for him to work on the computer for a long period of time. He had also promised me that he would buy it, and he makes a lot of promises to me that get pushed back because of money problems or health problems. I think it made him really depressed. He told me that he can’t do anything for me. He told me that if I hate him we should break up. I asked him if he wants to break up with me, because I didn’t think about breaking up. He said that he doesn’t want to break up, and he loves me, but he can’t do anything, and I could find someone much better than him who can share hobbies with me, has more money than him, and is nicer and able to spend more time with me.
I’ve been thinking about what he said a lot. I’ve been thinking about many things he said a lot. I don’t care if he doesn’t have much money. He’s 18, and a student. I really don’t expect him to be able to afford more than what he needs and I certainly don’t expect for him to provide for me. The thing about hobbies hit me hard, because I used to play the same mobile game as him, and he would play it with me on occasion (not very often, don’t know why). After I started playing pc games, he would reject all my requests to play mobile games with him. He started spending less and less time with me.
I personally think he thinks he’s burdening me and forcing me to make time for him, but that’s not true at all. If he asked me to play mobile Minecraft with him I would take the -50 SR penalty in overwatch and quit in a heartbeat (sorry if you’re gold in overwatch) to play with him. He tells me a lot, that I’m the opposite of him, that I’m bright, kind to others, and that everyone likes me, but that he’s different, and he’s dirty and can’t depend on anyone. The dirty thing is kind of hard to translate. I guess it could be tainted. I don’t want to share his personal backstory too much because it’s not my place to share. Things happened in the past that made him think this way and he was very hurt and has not recovered. I have mentioned therapy to him, but I don’t know exactly what he would have to do to get therapy or how the therapy is in Japan.
I realized that it’s very difficult for him to trust me. I try to tell him I love him every day. I tell him that I love him no matter what, I love him more than anyone, and I love him, including all his scars and all the hurt he’s been through. I see him try very hard, for me, to trust me and everything I say. My friends say he’s not a good boyfriend because he can’t make time to call me. But I think he’s scared. He’s bragged to his friends that he wants to marry me and stay with me forever. I think not being able to keep his promises to me is weighing down on him. I try to tell him that it’s okay, I understand, and I know he’s working hard and doing his best. That I don’t mind waiting a little longer, and even if we can’t play games together, I just want to talk to him and hear his voice. I just want to be happy together. I wanted to become a form of strength for him, especially when he struggles.
And I do love him. I do want to stay with him. He’s really special to me. I want to protect him. I want to be kind to him. Even talking about him makes me smile. I can confidently say I love him even when we’re having an off time or having an argument. I just feel like I realize too late that he’s struggling. He doesn’t want to talk about it. He always feels like he’s burdening me. I tell him every day that it’s okay, and that it’s not a burden, and there’s nothing that I want more than to just listen to him when he’s sad, because he admits he feels even a little bit better after he talks to me. I want him to smile. I want him to be happy. He told me he’s scared of losing me. He told me that he wants to get married and have children. He told me that he might not live long because of his health problems, and he hates going to the hospital for treatment, but everything is okay because he has me.
He hasn’t responded to me in 4 days. He plays games to relieve the stress and when the stress gets too much he completely runs away and only plays games. A mutual friend told me he’s been online so I know he’s still okay at the moment. I sent him a message including everything I thought of above, and that I want him to decide, for himself, and not for my sake, if he wants to break up with me, because I do love him and I don’t want to break up with him – I just want to spend more time with him. I really hope he responds, and I hope he can believe what I say, but I guess I’m scared and I really want to stay with him.
I don’t know if I really expect to get advice, but I guess I just wanted to try to get another opinion. Thank you for reading, if you did.
(This isn't a throwaway, I'm just new to reddit)
submitted by urutututu to relationship_advice [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 06:22 ur_wildest_dream I visited my family and I can't stand being here

The house is a mess ever since I moved out. My dad was always a hoarder and we often fight about trash he wants to keep. Things like an extremely old and dirty blanket. Where it was stored away and it got wet by the rain. So it has a lot of disgusting gunk and a foul smell. Why would he keep it? Cause it's a waste if we throw it out. It just needs washing.
He won't even let me use trashbags because we have old plastics or moving boxes to use instead to place the trash in. What's the point of having a trashbag? I am not a wasteful person. I often donate things that we don't even need because I rather it gets used by someone else who'll need it
My family moved in to a bigger house and I thought that would make things easier. Make things less cluttered and to throw out things we don't need. I thought wrong. The new house is even more messy than the old one. And this new house is significantly bigger. The room my sister and I share is always clean. I thought her to always clean up after herself. I mostly stay in that room because I can't stand even going down stairs.
The kitchen is disgusting. No matter how many times it gets cleaned and mopped there will always be dirt on the floor. The old stove there is very rusted and looks like a health hazard. The stove we use never gets cleaned anymore ever since I left. I literally can't stand being in the kitchen, knowing rats hide there too.
My brother doesn't clean up after himself too. He does a lot of coffee roasting so coffee "chaffe"(?) gets everywhere around the house and he refuses to clean it. We often fight too. We have misunderstandings but he's a good brother despite the mess.
I feel so bad for my sister. She's living the life I used to live. Always cleaning. Never having money for herself. Don't even have proper clothes because my Dad never buys her clothes. We were talking yesterday and she never gets the things she wants because my dad would always say there's no money. But he always has money to go out on dates with his girlfriend. My sister's phone is too old for her to make her art and play certain games. I plan on getting her an iPad when I have a job because I know she has potential. Right now she's making a painting with paint that was donated to her, since she can't even buy stuff for herself. And she's a fucking brilliant artist.
My dad thinks because he puts food on the table and a roof above our heads it's fine. He's literally giving us the bare fucking minimum. He didn't even pay for my college! It was my grandma who did it (education is cheaper here so student loans aren't a thing). If we ask him for things, he'll say I don't need it. You don't need the fucking latest iPhone or new basketball shoes but you have it. I lived such a bad life because I needed things for myself. I started college with a fucking old Nokia phone and I had no access to Facebook because we had no internet. I missed out so much school work because I don't have internet access. It's so embarrassing to attend class, only to know there was no class because it was posted online. I don't even have proper friends that time because I was enrolled to school late and I was the poor girl. I had to do sex work as soon as I turned 18 because I needed things he refused to get me. I had to shoplift things because I needed things for my skin (I have psoriasis). I wasn't proud but I had nothing. Oh and I was never brought up for a check up. He brought me to his doctor friend who gave me cream that made my skin worse.
I recently moved out to live with my boyfriend. Who saw how much I struggled living at home. He saw how bad our life was. He saw I literally have nothing. He gave me everything when my dad gave me nothing. He lend me his gaming laptop for me to get commissions done and play games (I always loved games but never had my own laptop or console for it). He got me a phone as a gift since my old phone was so beaten up. I recently graduated and I'm looking for a job. He's been the one feeding me (food that I'm actually allowed to eat and don't give my skin bad flare ups). I honestly feel like a freeloader but I'm doing my best to pay for things too. The virus makes it so hard to get a job but I do a lot of freelancing on the side. Now I'm living such a comfortable life in a small condo with no clutter.
Visiting the family made me realize how bad the quality of life they have here. It's so depressing. Right now I'm so hungry but I can't even cook in the kitchen since there's barely any food. I was gonna have cereal but there was no milk. I wanted to have an egg but there's nothing. It's all mostly instant noodles.
When my extended family found out they think I'm an ungrateful daughter. I should stay home and help around but it's not my job to be a house cleaner. They care more about what people would think of me living with my boyfriend.
I'm honestly happy living away from them. I love visiting for my siblings and my cat and dog but I can't stay too long or I'll go crazy.
submitted by ur_wildest_dream to raisedbynarcissists [link] [comments]

2020.10.22 04:12 yoyoyoyo__ AITA for expecting my bf (24) to pay more of the rent/bills than I do?

New to this particular subreddit. Be kind. Or don’t.
I’ve been dating this dude for a year and a half. We moved in together around the 1 year mark and I feel like he doesn’t contribute to the household. He pays his half of the rent and split the rest 50/50. That being said, I feel like I’m the only one who does any of the maintenance/cleaning of the apartment.
I’m pretty much the only one who cooks and cleans. Not only that, but I work 40 hours a week while he’s in his last semester of college (covid keeps him home). He doesn’t have a job and if I’m being honest, he spends most of the day playing video games or sleeping. He’ll squeeze in homework or a test when it’s due, but it’s not a whole lot from my understanding.
That being said, I’m tired of running around work all day and then coming home to a dirty apartment. The dishes are never done, grocery shopping doesn’t happen unless I do it, and the dog is never walked. It’s starting to make me very unhappy. I don’t think it’s fair that I work all day and have to come home and handle the house. So in my mind, it’s completely fair to expect him to “pay” me for my work when it comes to the apartment by taking more of the rent. Why should I be expected to split the rent 50/50 if he doesn’t split the housework 50/50?
AITA for wanting my bf to pick up more of the rent in return for not helping me with the house?
EDIT: My bad y’all lol. His family is well off and saved up a college fund for him. He got several scholarships and is sitting on most of the college fund.
I’ve asked for help and he’ll pick up the slack for a few days but it’s back to this after a few days.
I’m not sure if this is allowed but in every other way he makes me very happy. I’m just tired of being the one who works and cleans. 🤷🏻‍♀️
submitted by yoyoyoyo__ to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 22:37 SacKingsAmiiboHunter Library Suggestions - Best Shows/Movies I'm missing? (Excluding movies from last few years)

10 Cloverfield Lane (2016)/
10 Things I Hate About You (1999)/
12 Angry Men (1957)/
12 Years a Slave (2013)/
2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)/
21 Jump Street (2012)/
22 Jump Street (2014)/
3 Idiots (2009)/
3 Ninjas (1992)/
4 Months 3 Weeks And 2 Days (2007)/
50 First Dates (2004)/
A Bug's Life (1998)/
A Christmas Carol (2009)/
A Christmas Story (1983)/
A Night at the Roxbury (1998)/
A Separation (2011)/
A Simple Favor (2018)/
A Star Is Born (2018)/
A Walk to Remember (2002)/
Ace Ventura Pet Detective (1994)/
Ace Ventura When Nature Calls (1995)/
Ad Astra (2019)/
Aladdin (2019)/
Alien DC (1979)/
Alien vs Predator (2004)/
Almost Famous (2000)/
Amelie (2001)/
American Beauty (1999)/
American History X (1998)/
American Pie/
Anchorman 2 The Legend Continues (2013)/
Anchorman The Legend Of Ron Burgundy (2004)/
Anger Managment (2003)/
Animal House (1978)/
Ant-Man (2015)/
Apocalypto (2006)/
Aquaman (2018)/
Armageddon (1998)/
Arrival (2016)/
Arthur Christmas (2011)/
Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002)/
Austin Powers International Man of Mystery (1997)/
Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999)/
Avatar (2009)/
Avengers Age of Ultron (2015)/
Avengers Endgame (2019)/
Babe (1995)/
Back to the Future (1985)/
Back to the Future II (1989)/
Back to the Future III (1990)/
Bad Boys (1995)/
Bad Boys For Life (2020)/
Bad Boys II (2003)/
Baseketball (1998)/
Batman (1989)/
Batman Begins (2005)/
Batman Forever (1995)/
Batman Returns (1992)/
Batman The Dark Knight Returns Part 1 (2012)/
Batman The Dark Knight Returns Part 2 (2013)/
Batman v Superman Dawn of Justice (2016)/
Bean The Ultimate Disaster (1997)/
Beerfest (2006)/
Beethoven (1992)/
Beethovens 2nd (1993)/
Beethovens 3rd (2000)/
Beethoven's 4th (2001)/
Before Midnight (2013)/
Before Sunset (2004)/
Bend It Like Beckham (2002)/
Beverly Hills Cop (1984)/
Big Daddy (1999)/
Big Hero 6 (2014)/
Billy Madison (1995)/
Black Panther (2018)/
Blade Runner (1982)/
Blade Runner 2049 (2017)/
Blazing Saddles (1974)/
Blood Diamond (2006)/
Blow (2001)/
Blue Streak (1999)/
Borat (2006)/
Brave (2012)/
Braveheart (1995)/
Bridesmaids (2011)/
Bruce Almighty (2003)/
Caillou's Winter Wonders (2008)/
Camp Nowhere (1994)/
Captain America Civil War (2016)/
Captain America The First Avenger (2011)/
Captain America The Winter Soldier (2014)/
Captain Underpants The First Epic Movie (2017)/
Cars (2006)/
Cars 2 (2011)/
Cars 3 (2017)/
Casper (1995)/
Cast Away (2000)/
Chicken Run (2000)/
Children of Men (2006)/
Christmas With the Kranks (2004)/
Cinderella (2015)/
Citizen Kane (1941)/
City of God (2002)/
Clerks (1994)/
Clerks 2 (2006)/
Cloverfield (2008)/
Clueless (1995)/
Coco (2017)/
Cooties (2014)/
Coraline (2009)/
Coyote Ugly (2000)/
Crocodile Dundee (1986)/
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014)/
Dazed and Confused (1993)/
Deadpool (2016)/
Despicable Me (2010)/
Despicable Me 2 (2013)/
Die Hard Collection/
Dirty Dancing (1987)/
Disney Movies/
Disturbia (2007)/
Divergent (2014)/
Django Unchained (2012)/
Doctor Dolittle (1998)/
Dodgeball A True Underdog Story (2004) [1080p]/
Dogma (1999)/
Dr. Seuss How the Grinch Stole Christmas (1966)/
Drive (2011)/
Dude, Where's My Car (2000)/
Dumb and Dumber (1994)/
Dumb and Dumber To (2014)/
E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (1982)/
Easy A (2010)/
Eight Crazy Nights (2002)/
Elf (2003)/
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)/
Evan Almighty (2007)/
Ever After a Cinderella Story (1998)/
Ex Machina (2015)/
Face Off (1997)/
Facing the Giants (2006)/
Fargo (1996)/
Fast and Furious (2009)/
Fast Five (2011)/
Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)/
Fatal Attraction (1987)/
Felix The Cat - The Movie (1988)/
Ferris Buellers Day Off (1986)/
Fifty Shades Darker (2017)/
Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)/
Fight Club (1999)/
Finding Dory (2016)/
Finding Nemo (2003)/
Fist Fight (2017)/
Flubber (1997)/
Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008)/
Forrest Gump (1994)/
Frankenweenie (2012)/
Freaky Friday (2003)/
Friday (1995)/
Friday After Next (2002)/
Friday Night Lights (2004)/
Frozen (2013)/
Frozen II (2019)/
Furious 6 (2013)/
Furious Seven (2015)/
Game Night (2018)/
Gattaca (1997)/
Get a Clue (2002)/
Get Hard (2015)/
Get Him to the Greek (2010)/
Get Out (2017)/
Ghostbusters (1984)/
Gladiator (2000)/
Gone Girl (2014)/
Gone With The Wind (1939)/
Goodfellas (1990)/
Gran Torino (2008)/
Grave of the Fireflies (1988)/
Groundhog Day (1993)/
Guardians of the Galaxy (2014)/
Halloweentown Series/
Halo 4 Forward Unto Dawn (2012)/
Happy Gilmore (1996)/
Harold and Kumar Escape From Guantanamo Bay (2008)/
Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle (2004)/
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)/
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 (2010)/
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 (2011)/
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (2005)/
Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (2009)/
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (2007)/
Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004)/
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (2001)/
Her (2013)/
Hitch (2005)/
Hocus Pocus (1993)/
Holes (2003)/
Home Alone (1990)/
Home Alone 2 Lost in New York (1992)/
Home Alone 3 (1997)/
Homeward Bound The Incredible Journey (1993)/
Hoosiers (1986)/
Horrible Bosses (2011)/
Horrible Bosses 2 (2014)/
Hot Fuzz (2007)/
Hot Tub Time Machine (2010)/
How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)/
How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days (2003)/
How To Train Your Dragon (2010)/
How to Train Your Dragon 2 (2014)/
How To Train Your Dragon The Hidden World (2019)/
I Am Legend (2007)/
I Robot (2004)/
Inception (2010)/
Independence Day (1996)/
Indiana Jones Movies/
Inglourious Basterds (2009)/
Inside Out (2015)/
Interstellar (2014)/
Iron Man (2008)/
Iron Man 2 (2010)/
Iron Man 3 (2013)/
Isnt It Romantic (2019)/
It (2017)/
It Takes Two (1995)/
Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2001)/
Jimmy Neutron Boy Genius (2001)/
Jingle All the Way (1996)/
Johnny Tsunami (1999)/
Joker (2019)/
Jumanji (1995)/
Jumanji The Next Level (2019)/
Jumanji Welcome To The Jungle (2017)/
Juno (2007)/
Jurassic Park (1993)/
Jurassic Park III (2001)/
Jurassic Park The Lost World (1997)/
Jurassic World (2015)/
Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom (2018)/
Keanu (2016)/
Kick-Ass (2010)/
Kick-Ass 2 (2013)/
Kill Bill Vol 2 (2004)/
Kill Bill Vol. 1 (2003)/
King Kong (2005)/
Knocked Up (2007)/
La La Land (2016)/
Labyrinth (1986)/
Law Abiding Citizen (2009)/
Legally Blonde (2001)/
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events (2004)/
Leon The Professional (1994)/
Less Than Zero (1987)/
Liar Liar (1997)/
Life (2017)/
Life is Beautiful (1997)/
Little Giants (1994)/
Lord of the Rings Trilogy/
Lost in Translation (2003)/
Love Story (1970)/
Maid in Manhattan (2002)/
Man of Steel (2013)/
Me Before You (2016)/
Mean Girls (2004)/
Meet the Blacks (2016)/
Meet The Fockers (2004)/
Meet The Parents (2000)/
Megamind (2010)/
Memento (2000)/
Men In Black (1997)/
Men In Black 2 (2002)/
Men In Black 3 (2012)/
Minions (2015)/
Minority Report (2002)/
Mission Impossible - Fallout (2018)/
Mission Impossible - Rogue Nation (2015)/
Mission Impossible (1996)/
Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol (2011)/
Mission Impossible II (2000)/
Mission Impossible III (2006)/
Moana (2016)/
Modern Times (1936)/
Monster House (2006)/
Monsters Inc (2001)/
Monsters University (2013)/
Mr and Mrs Smith (2005)/
Mrs Doubtfire (1993)/
Muppets Most Wanted (2014)/
My Blue Heaven (1990)/
My Cousin Vinny (1992)/
My Neighbor Totoro (1988)/
Napoleon Dynamite (2004)/
National Treasure (2004)/
National Treasure Book of Secrets (2007)/
Neighbors (2014)/
Neighbors 2 Sorority Rising (2016)/
Next Friday (2000)/
Nine (2009)/
Now You See Me (2013)/
Now You See Me 2 (2016)/
Oceans Eleven (2001)/
Oceans Thirteen (2007)/
Oceans Twelve (2004)/
Office Space (1999)/
Old School (2003)/
Oldboy (2003)/
One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (1975)/
Our Lips Are Sealed (2000)/
Overboard (1987)/
P.S. I Love You (2007)/
Pacific Rim (2013)/
Pineapple Express (2008)/
Pirates of the Caribbean At World's End (2007)/
Pirates of the Caribbean Curse of the Black Pearl (2003).mp4/
Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Man's Chest (2006)/
Pirates of the Caribbean On Stranger Tides (2011)/
Pitch Perfect (2012)/
Pitch Perfect 2 (2015)/
Pokémon Mewtwo Strikes Back - Evolution (2019)/
Pokemon The First Movie (1998)/
Predator (1987)/
Pretty Woman (1990)/
Prisoners (2013)/
Pulp Fiction (1994)/
Rain Man (1988)/
Ran (1985)/
Rango (2009)/
Rat Race (2011)/
Ratatouille (2007)/
Rear Window (1954)/
Recess Schools Out (2001)/
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)/
Robots (2005)/
Rogue One A Star Wars Story (2016)/
Rugrants In Paris The Movie (2000)/
Rush Hour Trilogy/
Sausage Party (2016)/
Saving Private Ryan (1998)/
Saw Collection (2004-2010)/
Scarface (1983)/
Scary Movie (2000)/
Scary Movie 2 (2001)/
Scary Movie 3 (2003)/
Scary Movie 4 (2006)/
Scary Movie 5 (2013)/
Schindlers List (1993)/
Scoob (2020)/
Scooby Doo and the Ghoul School (1988)/
Scooby Doo and the Witch's Ghost (1999)/
Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island (1998)/
Scrooged (1988)/
Semi Pro (2008)/
Seven Pounds (2008)/
Seven Samurai (1954)/
Sex and the City (2008)/
Sex and the City 2 (2010)/
Shaun of the Dead (2004)/
She's the Man (2006)/
Shrek (2001)/
Shrek 2 (2004)/
Shutter Island (2010)/
Sideways (2004)/
Sin City (2005)/
Sisters (2015)/
Sixteen Candles (1984)/
Sleepless in Seattle (1993)/
Smallfoot (2018)/
Smart House (1999)/
Sonic The Hedgehog (2020)/
South Park Bigger Longer and Uncut (1999)/
Space Jam (1996)/
Spiderman 1 (2002)/
Spiderman 2 (2004)/
Spiderman 3 (2007)/
Spider-Man Into The Spider-Verse (2018)/
Spirited Away (2011)/
Split (2016)/
Stand by Me (1986)/
Star Wars Episode I The Phantom Menace (1999)/
Star Wars Episode II Attack of the Clones (2002)/
Star Wars Episode III Revenge of the Sith (2005)/
Star Wars Episode IV A New Hope (1977)/
Star Wars Episode V The Empire Strikes Back (1980)/
Star Wars Episode VI Return of the Jedi (1983)/
Star Wars Episode VII - The Force Awakens (2015)/
Step Brothers (2008)/
Stewie Griffin - The Untold Story (2005)/
Straight Outta Compton (2015)/
Stuart Little (1999)/
Suicide Squad (2016)/
Super Troopers (2001)/
Superbad (2007)/
Sweet Home Alabama (2002)/
Swingers (1996)/
Taken (2008)/
Taken 2 (2012)/
Taken 3 (2014)/
Talladega Nights The Ballad of Ricky Bobby (2006)/
Tangled (2010)/
Taxi Driver (1976)/
Team America World Police (2004)/
Ted (2012)/
Ted 2 (2015)/
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)/
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Out Of The Shadows (2016)/
Terminator 2 Judgment Day (1991)/
Terminator 3 Rise of The Machines (2003)/
Terminator Genisys (2015)/
The 40 Year Old Virgin (2005)/
The Amazing Spiderman (2012)/
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)/
The Artist (2011)/
The Avengers (2012)/
The Benchwarmers (2006)/
The Big Green (1995)/
The Bourne Identity (2002)/
The Bourne Legacy (2012)/
The Bourne Supremacy (2004)/
The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)/
The Brave Little Toaster (1987)/
The Breakfast Club (1985)/
The Cable Guy (1996)/
The Campaign (2012)/
The Cheetah Girls (2003)/
The Conjuring (2013)/
The Conjuring 2 (2016)/
The Dark Knight (2008)/
The Dark Knight Rises (2012)/
The Departed (2006)/
The Devil Wears Prada (2006)/
The Fast and the Furious (2001)/
The Fast and the Furious Tokyo Drift (2006)/
The Godfather Trilogy/
The Good Dinosaur (2015)/
The Good The Bad And The Ugly (1966)/
The Goonies (1985)/
The Great Gatsby (2013)/
The Great Outdoors (1988)/
The Greatest Showman (2017)/
The Green Mile (1999)/
The Grinch (2018)/
The Hangover (2009)/
The Hangover Part II (2011)/
The Hangover Part III (2013)/
The Hunger Games Collection/
The Incredible Hulk (2008)/
The Incredibles (2004)/
The Incredibles 2 (2018)/
The Iron Giant (1999)/
The Jungle Book (2016)/
The Karate Kid (1984)/
The Karate Kid Part II (1986)/
The Karate Kid Part III (1989)/
The Land Before Time (1988)/
The Land Before Time Movies/
The Lego Batman Movie (2017)/
The Lego Movie (2014)/
The Lizzie McGuire Movie (2003)/
The Longest Yard (2005)/
The Martian (2015)/
The Mask (1994)/
The Matrix (1999)/
The Matrix Reloaded (2003)/
The Matrix Revolutions (2003) + Extras/
The Message (1977)/
The Mummy (1999)/
The Mummy Returns (2001)/
The Muppets (2011)/
The NeverEnding Story (1984)/
The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993)/
The Notebook (2004)/
The Nutty Professor (1996)/
The Other Guys (2010)/
The Outsiders (1983)/
The Pagemaster (1994)/
The Parent Trap (1998)/
The Perfect Storm (2000)/
The Pink Panther (1963)/
The Pink Panther (2006)/
The Pink Panther 2 (2009)/
The Polar Express (2004)/
The Princess Bride (1987)/
The Princess Diaries (2001)/
The Princess Diaries 2 Royal Engagement (2004)/
The Quick And The Dead (1995)/
The Revenant (2015)/
The Road to El Dorado (2000)/
The Rugrats Movie (1998)/
The Sandlot (1993)/
The Santa Clause (1994)/
The Santa Clause 2 (2002)/
The School of Rock (2003)/
The Shawshank Redemption (1994)/
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)/
The Simpsons Movie (2007)/
The Social Network (2010)/
The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie (2004)/
The Stoned Age (1994)/
The Strangers (2008)/
The Terminal (2004)/
The Terminator (1984)/
The Transformers The Movie (1986)/
The Truman Show (1998)/
The Usual Suspects (1995)/
The Waterboy (1998)/
The Wizard of Oz (1939)/
The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)/
There's Something About Mary (1998)/
This is the End (2013)/
Thor (2011)/
Thor The Dark World (2013)/
Three Men and a Baby (1987)/
Titanic (1997)/
Tootsie (1982)/
Top Gun (1986)/
Toy Story (1995)/
Toy Story 2 (1999)/
Toy Story 3 (2010)/
Toy Story 4 (2019)/
Toy Story That Time Forgot (2014)/
Transformers (2007)/
Transformers Age of Extinction (2014)/
Transformers Dark of the Moon (2011)/
Transformers Revenge of the Fallen (2009)/
Trolls (2016)/
Trolls World Tour (2020)/
Tron (1982)/
Tron Legacy (2010)/
Tropic Thunder (2008)/
Twister (1996)/
Uncut Gems (2019)/
V for Vendetta (2006)/
Waiting (2005)/
Wallace and Gromit The Curse of the Were-Rabbit (2005)/
War Games (1983)/
Waynes World (1992)/
Waynes World 2 (1993)/
We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story (1993)/
When a Stranger Calls (1979)/
When a Stranger Calls (2006)/
When Harry Met Sally (1989)/
While You Were Sleeping (1995)/
Whiplash (2014)/
White Men Can't Jump (1992)/
Wild America (1997)/
Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)/
Winning London (2001)/
Youve Got Mail (1998)/
Zodiac (2007)/
Zoolander (2001)/
Zoolander 2 (2016)/
Zootopia (2016)/

30 Rock/
Are You Afraid Of The Dark/
Arrested Development/
Batman The Animated Series/
Beachbody Insanity/
Better Call Saul/
Bill Nye the Science Guy/
Boy Meets World/
Breaking Bad/
Code Geass/
Codename Kids Next Doo
Courage The Cowardly Dog/
Curb Your Enthusiasm/
Death Note/
Desperate Housewives/
Dexters Laboratory/
Dragon Tales/
Dragonball Z/
Drake and Josh/
Eastbound and Down/
Ed Edd n Eddy/
Even Stevens/
Everybody Loves Raymond/
Fairly Odd Parents/
Family Guy/
Forensic Files/
Foster's House for Imaginary friends/
Full House/
Game of Thrones/
George Lopez/
Gossip Girl/
Grey's Anatomy/
Hey Arnold!/
Home Improvement/
How I Met Your Mothe
I love Lucy/
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia/
Jersey Shore/
Jersey Shore Family Vacation/
Jimmy Neutron/
Kenan And Kel/
King Of The Hill/
Leaving Neverland/
Lizzie McGuire/
Looney Tunes Golden Collection/
Macolm in the Middle/
Magic School Bus/
Married With Children/
Modern Family/
Mr Bean/
Mr Bean The Animated Series/
Mr Beans Hoilday (2007)/
One Tree Hill/
Parks and Recreation/
Pinky and the Brain/
Prison Break/
Rick and Morty/
Rocket Powe
Scooby Doo, Where Are You!/
Silicon Valley/
Sons of Anarchy/
South Park/
SpongeBob SquarePants/
Star Trek The Next Generation/
Star Trek The Original Series/
Stranger Things/
That '70s Show/
That's So Raven/
The Amanda Show/
The Big Bang Theory/
The Fresh Prince of Bel-Ai
The Goldbergs/
The King of Queens/
The New Adventures of Old Christine/
The New Scooby-Doo Movies/
The Office (UK)/
The Office (US)/
The Pink Panther Show/
The Powerpuff Girls/
The Proud Family/
The Ropers/
The Simpsons/
The Sopranos/
The Suite Life of Zack and Cody/
The Sylvester & Tweety Show/
The Wire/
The Wonder Years/
This is Us/
Three's a Crowd/
Threes Company/
Tom & Jerry/
Two and a Half Men/
Up (2009)/
Vice Principals/
What I Like About You/
Zoey 101/
submitted by SacKingsAmiiboHunter to PleX [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 20:56 TwoofftheTop [FT] Alien Frontiers, Get Off My Land!, The Godfather, Police Precinct, Robinson Crusoe, Summit and more! [W] Coldwater Crown, Fortune and Glory expansions, Eclipse: Second Dawn for the Galaxy, The Oracle of Delphi, Through the Desert and plenty more! [Loc] Baltimore, MD 21201

I have several games up for grabs. Would love to work out a trade. Located in Baltimore, Maryland, 21201. I have posted this under my other username in the past (Backjurden) but I'm trying to make this account my 'board game' account. I can provide further verification as well.
What I got:
Alien Frontiers - This edition.
First Martians: Adventures on the Red Planet
Get Off My Land! w/ Kickstarter Exclusive Promo Cards
The Godfather: Corleone's Empire
Le Havre: The Inland Port
JAB: Realtime Boxing
Jurassic Park: Danger! Adventure Strategy Game
Martians: A Story of Civilization
Monopoly: Franklin Mint Collectors Edition - Some sun damage on the middle felt. Piece and cards are still pristine and in shrink wrap. Pics available upon request.
Police Precinct w/ Dice Tower Exclusive Character Set and Dirty Bomb promo
Revolution of 1828
Robinson Crusoe: Adventures on the Cursed Island - The normal sized box edition.
Sons of Anarchy: Men of Mayhem w/ Grim Bastards expansion - All in the base box.
Summit: The Board Game w/ Yeti Expansion - Both boxes are available.
For trades, here's the games I'm most interested in (in no particular order) but my trade list is up to date as well. Feel free to send over any offers! I'm more than willing to combine several games for one or get several smaller games for one of mine. I can also pitch in some money with a game(s) to make a trade more balanced.
I'm also not opposed to buying any of the games on my trade lists so if you have any to sell, let me know! Condition doesn't really matter to me as long as they're playable.
Games I'm looking for:
Bloc by Bloc: The Insurrection Game
Brass: Lancashire
The Captain is Dead
Coldwater Crown
Crokinole board
Cthulhu Wars
Fortune and Glory: The Cliffhanger Game expansions
Detective: City of Angels
Dice Forge
Dune (and/or expansion)
Eclipse: Second Dawn for the Galaxy
Five Tribes expansions
Flash Point: Fire Rescue expansions (Extreme Danger, Tragic Events, Fire Prevention Specialist, Urban Structures, Veteran and Rescue Dog)
Mansions of Madness Second Editions expansions: Horrific Journeys, Sanctum of Twilight and/or Streets of Arkham
The Oracle of Delphi
PitchCar and expansions (Any. Highly wanted)
PitchCar mini and/or expansions (Highly wanted)
Potion Explosion
Quantum (preferably with Entanglement and The Void but beggars can't be choosers)
Sol: Last Days of a Star
Through the Desert
Tikal: Super Meeple edition (highly wanted)
Tornado Rex (Highly wanted)
War Room
Xia: Legends of a Drift System and/or Xia: Embers of a Forsaken Star
Zombicide: Invader
Zombicide: Rue Morgue
I'm also interested in wooden inserts (Broken Token, Meeple Reality, etc.). You can check my owned games or just let me know what you have!
Let me know if you have any questions! I've done plenty of trades on here/miniswap (on my other account) and on BGG.
submitted by TwoofftheTop to BoardGameExchange [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 20:37 GloriousStoicWarrior Automotive Repair Shop Office PC

What will you be doing with this PC? Be as specific as possible, and include specific games or programs you will be using.
This PC is to replace our current machine in our car repair garage... Email, general office, web surfing for parts and information, Garage CRM System, Printing
Ideally want to future proof it as much as possible so it last a good few years.
What is your maximum budget before rebates/shipping/taxes?
When do you plan on building/buying the PC? Note: beyond a week or two from today means any build you receive will be out of date when you want to buy.
What, exactly, do you need included in the budget? (ToweOS/monitokeyboard/mouse/etc)
ToweOS/Keyboard (wired) / Mouse (wired)
Which country (and state/province) will you be purchasing the parts in? If you're in US, do you have access to a Microcenter location?
United Kingdom
If reusing any parts (including monitor(s)/keyboard/mouse/etc), what parts will you be reusing? Brands and models are appreciated.
None (aside from Printer)
Will you be overclocking? If yes, are you interested in overclocking right away, or down the line? CPU and/or GPU?
Are there any specific features or items you want/need in the build? (ex: SSD, large amount of storage or a RAID setup, CUDA or OpenCL support, etc)
Do you have any specific case preferences (Size like ITX/microATX/mid-towefull-tower, styles, colors, window or not, LED lighting, etc), or a particular color theme preference for the components?
As small form factor as possible. Will be mounted under a desk. Obviously is in a car repair centre, so is a dirty and dusty environment if that’s a consideration. Also, white peripherals and pils don’t go well together.
Do you need a copy of Windows included in the budget? If you do need one included, do you have a preference?
Yes. Windows 10
submitted by GloriousStoicWarrior to buildapcforme [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 16:19 insecurebiatchhelp I find blowjobs and anal degrading.

I've labelled this as a rant, but I'm more so just curious about what others think.
So, majority of us are introduced to sex way before having it by watching porn.
Porn is, of course, male centred. Even lesbian porn is made for men. Everything is about him and the male audience. The sex ends once he has finished, not when she has. Fake moaning and few orgasms for her (if any). Women being seen as eager and willing to please, doing anything for him. And so on.
The only person being pleasured here is men. In porn it is often seen as a form of degregation, even in more soft core professional porn because he is using her (male fantasy). This sexy beautiful women is being throat fucked and used by him, like nothing but a toy for his pleasure. Men enjoy this as they like the thought of a beautiful woman submitting to their use. That is the point of porn, to please the male fantasy.
This is then enforced in society, where we see blow jobs and normal. You can totally imagine a woman giving her man a quick sneaky blow job in the car. But you would never hear of a man going down on a woman without getting something in return. It's mostly always his pleasure, or none at all. But women are always expected to be willing to give oral, while men so rarely do the same. They often say they don't like it, women are gross/smelly, or they only do it in serious relationships. They have all the excuses, but if a women doesn't like giving then she is a stuck up prude.
I hear all the time also when a guy is nice and enthusiastic about dating a woman, then she must have amazing head game. As if...he can only like her if she is willing to please him. As though...the only women who are worth dating are those who willing subject themselves to being used by men, without anything in return.
How can a man truly look at a woman as he fucks her mouth, and think lovingly things of her? He isn't pleasing her, just himself, fucking her mouth when her body has a hole for that exact purpose. What he is thinking at this time is how good it is to have this woman on her knees for his own pleasure.
All in all it just seems degrading to me because it is seen as using a woman. In porn it is more often than not, a form of degregation. How can we not say that this isn't projected onto mens minds also?
Then with anal. It is known to be painful for women, and yet they still hound women for it. Begging after she has said no. Shaming their partner online because they never let's him stick it in her ass but his ex totally let him all the time.
It is seen as taboo and dirty. Something you cannot have, and so they want it more. Getting it is seen as a big achievement, and once you give in they want it all the time.
She has a vagina. With the right moves and technique, she can get off and feel pleasure though PIV. But they'd rather cause pain and stick it in another hole because they see it in porn all the time. Again, they see her as something for his use and pleasure only, not caring about her pleasure.
Of course there are exceptions, some women like anal, but they likely had to be hounded before hand to finally try it.
Overall, I just find them both to be degrading. You're with your partner, and the only thing you're focused on is your own pleasure, even risking causing her pain or to choke/gag. Doesn't seem right to me.
I think they both support patriarchal and misogynistic views that women exist only to benefit men.
What are your thoughts?
submitted by insecurebiatchhelp to TwoXSex [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 15:00 jg429 Sub Basement Noise

Sub-Basement Noise is our daily thread for off-topic content and ATL content that doesn't really need its own thread.
Basement Noise Virtual Shows Have Been Announced!
Basement Noise Megathread
Dates: 10/9 (WUS), 10/23 (Rian's set), 11/13 (Alex's set), 12/4 (Zack's set), 12/18 (Jack's set)
Streams are $15 each and there is a variety of merch packages to choose from
Make sure you are up-to-date on our piracy rule before the shows air
Wake Up, Sunshine post-stream discussion
Rian's Set Pre-Stream Discussion
Nothing Personal Survivor Round 1
Hot Takes: Fan club is useless
Dirty Work Survivor: Results
All Song Survivor: Round 19
Off-Topic Thread: Halloween!
Face Art Merch Contest Voting: Vote Here!
submitted by jg429 to alltimelow [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 14:24 spookyspacedog i need to vent about my shitty neighbors

i have a history of always having bad, creepy, annoying neighbors.
the first one i remember was this man who my dad referred to as, “officer shit head”. i remember the police coming to our house a lot and i guess it was because our neighbor called them on us constantly for any little thing. we were listening to music, we were having a barbecue, we had a little pool, we were being “too noisy”, my dad said the man was just racist and just trying to get us to move out.
after that, our neighbors tried to fight us and then kill us. i won’t get into that but it was a whole legal-court thing.
we moved to a new home and our neighbors to the left were basically office shit head 2.0, he was threatening to call ICE on us, even though we are legal. he would pretend to water the side of his house just so he could look into our window. but our window had this like film over it so he couldn’t.
the neighbor across from us was like really strange. we used to see his wife all the time and we would talk to her too. then she was just gone for 6 months and i don’t know their house started to feel weird and her husband was creepy and i don’t know. we had a bad feeling about it. then she came out one day and we tried talking to her but she ignored us and wouldn’t even look over at the house. they moved out pretty quickly after that.
then my brothers girlfriend’s family actually lived next door to the across the street neighbor. her parents were always in competition with us and that was always lame. it felt like we couldn’t decorate our house without them always watching us and trying to be louder and bigger. we never fell into their games, and yes they were games, so i think that angered them more. they used to treat my brother like shit and even overreacted when they found out they were dating. like her dad was outside punching his van and her mom broke my brothers phone (she thought it was her daughters but i don’t know about that). after that whenever we went outside her dad went outside. my mom tried multiple times to talk to them about my brother sneaking in to their house to have sex with their daughter. my mom tried to stop my brother but he wasn’t going to listen so she went to her parents to tell them to lock their doors and to please not shoot or call the cops. then out of no where her mom blurts out “M doesn’t like your cooking” and my mom was like i’m not talking about that.. and her mom said “well M tells us he can’t stand your cooking and he’d rather eat my food” (which was a lie, M loves my moms cooking, he wolfs it down and doesn’t leave any of the rest for others. and her mom even later admitted that she lied to get my mom mad) then my brothers girlfriend’s sister tried to fight me bc apparently i cut her off ? i honestly don’t remember that at all, i felt like she was trying to start shit so we could fight.
after that i moved to an apartment and my neighbor there was horrible. he was always watching me, he tried hitting on me, he even had the cops called on him bc he had a gun and was holding his mother hostage. the cops had to come to my door and evacuate me. he was only in jail for a week and he was back home doing meth and drinking whiskey in his car outside. even when we first moved in he came out and told us that the apartment had cockroaches and we told him we didn’t mind bc we had a really recipe for cockroaches that killed them/kept them away. and he got mad and said “but then they’re gonna come to my home!!!” and then he tried to tell us our apartment was moldy. (it wasn’t) so after all that, i was going to move again and he started screaming at us outside calling us cholos and bitches. (we are the furthest thing from cholos lol) he was calling me a dirty whore and telling me to go back to my hometown. we had to call the cops to evacuate us.
now i moved in with my mom & step dad bc of the pandemic, and my neighbor to my right is so fucking weird. his son is best friends with my step brother so it’s kind of hard to tell him something bc i don’t want to start anything. (and i won’t) but i just have to vent this.
the first time i met him i knew he was weird. he came to the door and was knocking and i didn’t open it bc i didn’t know who he was but i was talking to him through the security door. and he kept asking me “which one are you? who are you?” and i asked him “no, who are YOU?” and he asked again “who are you?”. so i asked again, “who are you? you came here..” and he was like “i’m the neighbor, can you tell [step dads name] i’m going to be calling the cops on his gardeners bc they keep mowing my side of the lawn” and i said okay and slammed the door on him. the gardeners were not mowing his side of the lawn, they were mowing ours at a different height and he didn’t like how it looked uneven.
then he told me to move my car once, when i didn’t have to, i don’t know why he told me that? anyways. after that he asked my step dad if he could water our lawn (bc he mows and waters his lawn EVERY DAY. he’s always outside mowing. watering i understand but mowing? sometimes there’s nothing to mow.. he just wants to be nosy) and my step dad told him yes. we quickly told him to tell him no because we didn’t trust him. he stares at us, and he KNOWS we go outside daily to water and take care of our plants. he knows we do that so his intentions on “helping us” were definitely shady. and they were bc he was already walking up to our front door and grabbing the water hose and asking if he could go in our garage. my step dad told him never mind about watering our lawn. so then after that my stepdad’s friend was helping me out with my car and he had taken it out for a spin and he kinda parked it further up than i usually do, which wasn’t an issue but it didn’t leave my mom much room to park when she got home.
so i saw her car pull up and i grabbed my keys and was just going to back it up so she would have room to park. when i was walking out i saw that the neighbor was walking to her car (bc she was waiting for me) and he poked his head inside and i guess he told my mom if she wanted to she could park in front of his house instead. where i was parked at literally i only had to back it up a few feet and her car would’ve fit. if she parked in front of his house she would have to walk a distance to get our house and it was just weird and didn’t make sense at all. so my mom told him it was fine because i was coming out to back it up and he goes “oh? is that your daughters car??” and she was like “..yeah?” and he said “you don’t even look old enough to have a daughter that age” and when he saw me come he walked away. he knows that’s my car bc he told me to move it ?? and yesterday i had went outside and i caught him watering the plants. i don’t know why that losses me off but i use the time to water my plants to relax and find some serenity. water plants calms me down and i love taking care of them. so him doing it just makes me feel upset.
i don’t know why he is doing it when we told him he doesn’t have to, i feel like his intentions aren’t good. he was so weird and makes me feel uncomfortable when he stares and hides. we’ve caught him hiding behind his trees watching us. we had also got a new side gate-door bc our old one was kinda spacey and you could see into our backyard and i caught him a couple of times trying to play with my bullmastiff. we got the gate changed to a solid door so he can’t look into our yard anymore.
i feel like maybe i’m overreacting but i’m so sick and tired of having crummy neighbors. i feel like i can’t trust them, and it’s smart not to, but i just want some nice neighbors for once.
submitted by spookyspacedog to neighborsfromhell [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 09:13 SireBoone Down The Rabbit Hole

"When I put in the request for some hitters I didn't expect to get a team of scalp collectors." The grey-haired and stubble-faced OGA spook we were suddenly assigned to joked as he entered our hooch without knocking.
Just another typical day in the SAD...
Lee (Our Team Lead) responded to the sour joke regarding war crime allegations against our team, by holding out a gloved hand towards the man. The man shook Lee's hand with a firm grip, causing the long sleeves of his combat shirt to shift, revealing a sleeve tattoo of a serpent on his massive left forearm.
"You all can call me Martin and before we step off I just want to say that it's damn good to be working alongside Team guys again," He glanced around the room at all of us, "There's no one else I'd want to cover my six in a fight.".
"Likewise..." I responded, shaking his hand next as we left the warmth of the hooch and into the night.
Our eight-man team exited the "Compound" that we shared with the other SOF teams in the area without a word as they went about their business.
"Allen you seem off... You good bro?" Lucky (Another assaulter) asked while scratching his bushy ginger beard that was reminiscent of a Game Of Thrones character as we passed one of the HESCO bunkers
"Shit... I... I lost it." I patted around my combat pants and fleece pockets franticly.
"Lost what? Your tampons?" He chuckled before his face went serious, "Oh god, don't tell me it was your wedding band." He glanced around on the barren trash covered fields surrounding us, "Dude, Lauren is going to castrate you with dental floss if she finds out you lost it.".
Wrecker (One of our breachers) decided to shave his mountain man beard in favor of a mustache, shrugged in amusement.
I quickly pulled my hand out of my fleece pocket from under my kit, giving Lucky the finger causing them to chuckle as I spoke up once more, "I plan on seeing you two at my little girl's birthday party when we're stateside yeah? It's only fair since I've been to all of your kids' parties after all.".
"I'll bring my boys and beers." Wrecker answered first, running a hand over his thick mustache.
"What about you Lucky?" I asked with a grin, blowing air into my hands in an attempt to warm them from the freezing night-time temperatures that tended to linger as the sun began to crest over the horizon, turning the deathly pale lit sky into a bloody orange color.
"I'll bring the steaks but I don't think Jess will go, she's at that "fight the power" stage and is wanting to go see her mother six states over." He answered through clenched teeth as we climbed into the second dust-covered truck in the column that awaited us.
"Raider-Two this is One, how are things looking back there?" Lee's static-filled voice asked over the squad channel after thirty minutes of driving in awkward silence.
I keyed the PTT button bound to my kit and opened my mouth to speak when we hit a giant hole in the road, causing me to slam into the door frame with an audible Thud as the guys in the backseat let out curses.
"Raider-One, -Two... we're solid," I responded, rubbing my sore shoulder while cursing under my breath.
"Check, everyone stay frosty, we're in indian territory." Came Lee's response as a group of refugees drifted past us like ghosts.
Shadowy contorted figures lined both sides of the road in front of us and as the ambient light grew brighter, revealing that the "Figures" were women, children, and men all frozen in states of rigor mortis and in various states of decay.
The sight sent a chill down my spine as I pulled my eyes away and scanned the surrounding area for threats, hugging my modified HK416 a little closer to my chest.
This fucked up conflict has hurt more than just stock values and some oil Barron's pockets.
I was snapped out of my internal rant by two Russian SU-25s that boomed overhead in a low flyby towards the city to the north of us before a streak of red tracer fire lagged lazily behind them.
The jets looped in a wide arc, avoiding the firey red tracers before starting their approach from the east, dropping their payloads, and pulling off at full speed. A few seconds later dull thuds shook the ground beneath us followed by distant deep bassed Booms as we pulled onto a dirt trail.
"Lots of players at the table," Wrecker spoke up from the backseat as we passed the charred remains of a minivan stuck in a ditch at a crossroads we turned onto.
The reason this image is still seared into my memory was what remained in the backseat. It was only a fraction of a second but I managed to capture it clearly like a photo. In the back seat was a small foot with a melted pink shoe stuck to it that rested over the end of a melted car seat.
"It's only a matter of time now before someone folds." Lucky's voice pulled me back to reality as we finally arrived at an abandoned glass factory on the outskirts of the city.
A skinny figure came out from one of the supervisor offices to our left before walking into the headlights. "Allen, Lee! It's good to see you, my friends!" Ed, our terp and long-time friend from previous deployments, greeted us with a bear hug as we exited the trucks.
"I see that you have a new watch for the collection." I pointed to his wrist before looking down at my Sunnto watch, the digital numbers read 0730.
"Oh! yeah, I got his one from a group of Rangers after helping them down in (REDACTED) a few weeks ago." He responded with a sheepish grin, showing off the oversized G-Shock watch on his wrist before Martin joined us at the hood of the truck.
"Listen up! We're going in with a local militia team headed by a fighter called Hasheem, who agreed to fight alongside us. Lee, I want you and your team to assist with the door-to-door search for this shithead, he's our HVT." Martin placed a small tablet over the map he put on the hood of the truck before tapping the screen.
The picture that popped up made us look at one another with confused glances.
"Is this a joke?" Lucky asked looking over at Martin with a frown, "Allen put a bullet through his skull a few weeks ago. Hell, you were probably there, we took his prints, photos, and everything." Lucky tapped the hood, shifting his stance uncomfortably as I ran a hand through my shaggy hair.
"According to HUMINT and our drone feeds he's alive and well in the area that I have highlighted." Martin tapped on the southern section of the map marked in red, "I figured since you've dealt with the guy previously you might be able to pick him out if our Russian and Daesh friends haven't got to him yet.".
"Are Hasheem and his men ready?" I asked taking in every detail of the picture. The laid back atmosphere was now gone and replaced by a sense of eagerness and determination.
"On standby and waiting for my word," Martin answered, pulling the shemagh hanging over his shoulders up over his head.
The HVT looked the same as the night I put a bullet in him. Short with a strong build of a weight lifter, his black long hair was cut short and beard well-groomed. The only thing that was off was the center of his face seemed slightly deformed.
How are you still alive?
We arrived in the search area fifteen minutes later accompanied by Hasheem and eight of his fighters, bringing us up to twenty-six men total including the OGA guys.
Destroyed and ransacked buildings surrounded us like giant skeletal fingers as we began our search down the cluttered streets of our target area.
I peeled away from the main group and entered a tea shop as Ed, Wrecker, and Lucky followed close behind.
"Hasheem shouldn't be trusted bro," Ed whispered as I flipped over a large patch of carpet in the center of the darkened room, revealing a large brown stain and putrid remains of a body.
"Why is that Ed?" I asked scanning a doorway leading further into the structure.
"He's..." Ed was cut off by a sudden burst of static and yelling from his handheld radio we used to monitor ICOM chatter. "It's... A survivor, calling for help." Ed spoke fast as he held the radio to his ear. "He's in the (REDACTED) hotel, three blocks down.".
I relayed the information to Lee, exiting the shop to see the other half of the mixed up team moving up the street with weapons raised.
"Check, we're on it," Lee responded as I joined a group of Hasheem's guys in a destroyed restaurant a few blocks down from us.
A sudden clatter of metal on metal followed by a heated commotion broke out from further inside the darkened structure as my boots stepped on the glass littering the marble floors with a loud Crunch with each step taken.
Ed pushed past me and took point into a back room, "I don't trust these guys." He mumbled.
I followed closely as he stepped through a set of double doors that lead into a massive kitchen. We were greeted by the sight of three militiamen, who were standing over the dead naked body of a man surrounded by empty brass casings and dead fighters that were still clutching onto their weapons.
"What the hell happened in here?" I asked curiously as Ed started to repeat the question in Arabic to our cohorts, "Ed you don't have to ask them." I stopped him midsentence as it finally hit him.
"Oh... Right." Ed shook his head in agreement as he crouched down next to the dead man.
The naked man was shot to shreds. What remained of his head lay in a puddle of gore and gray matter inside the doorframe of a walk-in freezer that had been off for some time that was still filled with rotten food that stunk up the room as flies buzzed around.
"Damn, he's gone." Wrecker coughed as he spat a stream of tobacco juice onto the floor followed by the sudden clicking of claws on the floor that caused me to look back once more.
Cujo, our working dog, came scrambling into the cramped back room with Duncan, her handler in tow.
Duncan's AOR1 patterned combat pants were stained with dirt, soot, and what looked like blood as Cujo clawed her way into the freezer.
"Found more fighters in the hotel along with some of our Russian friends.". He wiped a line of sweat off his face with the back of his dirty hand as he followed her, stepping over the dead bodies and into the freezer as the gunshots echoed through the streets.
Who the hell is shooting?
"Disregard the shooting, it's the fuckin' Militia guys shooting parked cars." Someone called out on the radio, answering my question as Cujo scratched at the wall before yapping loudly before sitting.
"Good girl!" Duncan cooed, pulling on a metal panel revealing a pully device. "Want me to send her in?" Duncan asked looking between us.
"I need to clear the entrance first." Wrecker spoke as traced for any traps, "Allen call it in. I'll get this door open.".
"Check," I peeled back into the kitchen and glanced around, "Ed can you get these fucking guys to pull security or do something useful?" I asked, pointing at the bored-looking militia members who just walked around the room as dull thuds echoed from upstairs.
"Actually, get them to go check out that noise upstairs." I gave him a quick thumbs-up with a fake smile before pointing to the ceiling.
"Uh, sure thing." He replied before yelling at the men who just frowned at him and walked out.
"Raider-One this is Two, we have a hidden compartment at the restaurant you passed. We're going to investigate." I released the PTT button and looked back, "Ed! Make sure nobody shoots us in the ass.".
On a cement support slab above me, was faded Russian writing under the Hammer and Sickle insignia from the former Soviet Union.
"Smells like a public pool in here." Wrecker spoke with a sneer, activating the light mounted to his rifle revealing a corridor at the bottom of the stairwell as Cujo looked up at me with her pink tongue poking out from the side of her mouth with a look that said, Playtime?.
"Search," Duncan ordered. Cujo snapped her head towards the hall and began her sweep down the reinforced cement corridor.
Observation windows and reinforced doors lined the walls in a staggered column down the hallway. I glanced inside one as we passed it, seeing a metal table with a decomposed body strapped to it along with dated medical equipment beside it.
"Looks like one of the chemical caches we hit a few days back," I whispered as we passed another door that was ripped off its hinges, dried blood was speckled on the floor and walls as I stepped inside the entryway only to have Wrecker call my name.
I rushed to his voice to see him in a storage room, holding a gas mask covered in cobwebs and dust in both hands before crouching down over a wooden crate with big red letters in Russian seemed to say, Don't fuck with.
"Should I open pandora's box?" He asked looking up at me while tracing the top of the crate.
"Hell no! Document it, and let's get out of here," I responded, walking into the previous room I had passed. A large metal table sat in front of the observation window with blood-soaked documents scattered on it along with a cassette deck that I pocketed.
On the right side of the room was a line of cages along the wall stacked up to the ceiling that sat open and empty. It was unnerving and made the hair on my neck stand up.
"Grab everything." A voice called out from beside me, causing me to pivot towards it with my rifle at the ready only to see Martin standing there as Cujo and Duncan went up the stairs.
"Everything?" I asked looking at the documents in front of me. He gave me a nod and stepped out.
"I swear... If I get fuckin' killed because of this stupid fuckin'..." Wrecker muttered as he hefted the "Nope" box up the flight of stairs with carefully placed steps as I tried not to drop the two huge boxes of reports tucked under both of my arms.
We were halfway to the trucks when I spotted two militia guys in my peripheral vision, who tried to push a parked car out from the middle of the road across from us as another group closer to them watched in amusement while laughing.
These guys are fucking amateurs where'd Martin find them?
I faced them while walking, screaming every phrase short of "fuck off" in Arabic as the two men slammed into the back of the car once more. It rocked forward and they disappeared in a bright flash.
Things went dark and I suddenly felt weightless. I finally managed to pry my eyes open to see nothing but dust and stray papers falling from the sky as distant screaming and a high-pitched ringing filled my ears.
Shit, this hurts! I craned my neck over to see Wrecker scanning our flanks with his P226 in his off-hand as a piece of jagged shrapnel protruded from the forearm of his shooting hand. He coughed hard, sending out a wad of blood that lapped over his chin as a small white object skittered across the pavement as he coughed again.
I tried to sit up straight sending a sharp pain through my body as I clutched my rifle.
"Move! Move!" Someone yelled over the radio as one of the men got pulled back into the restaurant by their legs.
"Allen! Allen! You good bro?" Lucky's distant voice and bearded face suddenly appeared in front of me as he helped me up to my feet. "Lee! Allen and Wrecker are hit!" His face contorted into a look of anger. "Can you walk? I need you to walk buddy, you're fucking heavy.".
"I... I can... Walk..." I stammered, reading my rifle as I took a wobbly step towards the trucks.
Hasheem, the militia leader who I didn't see until now, came strutting towards us from one of the shops wearing a red beret and aviators with an ancient-looking M9 clutched in his right hand.
"What are we running for?" He asked in heavily accented English while pointing towards the restaurant. "Who's in there?".
"Get your fucking guys situated on this street and pull security!" Lucky yelled at him, spittle flying from his mouth as a raging gunfight suddenly broke out.
Hasheem's brow furrowed as the dead naked man, who now had a portion of his head back, slowly walked into the street accompanied by small contorted blood-soaked creatures that had bone-like spines sticking out from their pale skin. They moved on all fours like fucked up humanoid dogs in our direction while snapping their jaws lined with razor-sharp teeth.
What the fuck...
One of Hasheem's men quickly set up a PKM on an overturned table next to us and fired down the street. I watched in horror as Chunks of flesh and bone spewed from the creatures who seemed to shrug off the rounds, sending a wave of fear through my scrambled mind.
"Yalla! Yalla!" Hasheem screamed while firing into the group as the naked man reached into a rubble pile by his feet, ripping out a piece of rebar before throwing it like a fucking javelin with his good hand.
The piece of rebar cut through the air and impacted with the PKM gunner's head with a sickening wet crunch, stopping the gunfire as the poor bastard fell onto the street with a confused look on his mangled face.
"Send in the QRF! Now!" Martin yelled as he picked up the "Nope" crate that landed on the sidewalk a few meters away while maneuvering towards the lead truck in the column behind us.
In my TBI-induced state, I tripped over a severed leg or rock? Just as a chunk of cement the size of a basketball flashed past my head by an inch, impacting the windshield of the lead truck as I landed on my back.
Lee suddenly appeared out of nowhere, taking a knee beside me as he steadied the aim of the stubby M79 40mm grenade launcher in his hands.
The M79 burped with a Fwoomp as the HE round landed short, sending dust, blood, and chunks of pavement into the air as he helped me back up, sending waves of nausea and pain through my body. Lucky jumped into the bed of the lead truck and reappeared with a 240, letting loose a stream of fire as the other OGA guys joined the fight
Adrenaline burned through my veins like liquid fire as more creatures poured out from the restaurant and into the street like a flood.
Trying to control my fear, I steadied my aim fired a short controlled burst at the cluster of creatures who were tearing through the militia and OGA guys attempting to run. Time seemed to speed up as one of my rounds split a creature's head in two as it clawed at an OGA guy who fell over his buddy.
He clutched a small cylindrical object in his hand as the large group swarmed over him before they went up in a bloody dust cloud as the shockwave rattled my skull as I hunkered down behind the engine block of the truck.
"Are they..." Ed asked aloud, peeking from behind the tailgate of the lead vehicle as the gunfire stopped, leaving us in silence as debris and body parts pelted my helmet as I swapped out my empty magazine.
Four mags down six to go...
I did a quick self-check, wiping blood from my nose before glancing behind me to see Wrecker being worked on by Lucky when a single shot rang out. I snapped my rifle towards the creatures only to see Hasheem. He started to cheer and clap with his men around the dead and dying creatures that were still clawing at them.
I tried to yell when a sudden wave of nausea hit, causing me to almost double over as Ed shouted.
I watched through blurred vision as Hasheem's victory was cut short when the not so dead naked man suddenly sat back up and pulled him down into his lap.
In one fluid motion, he snapped Hasheem's neck at an unnatural angle before throwing him to the side as his men screamed out in terror. "Shit! Shit! Shit!" Ed was losing his cool as another cluster of creatures emerged from an alleyway to our left.
I picked my targets, placing kill shots that only seemed slow their advance as the creatures with working extremities from the grenade blast began to crawl towards us.
I swapped out another magazine and glanced back to see a group of humvees screeching to a stop a few yards behind us as Martin yelled at the lead vehicle's crew, the guy mounting the Ma' Deuce opened fire.
Then a man wearing a uniform I didn't recognize exited from the back seat with an AT-4 anti-tank weapon in hand.
"Clear backblast!" He yelled out behind me as I continued firing.
"Backblast clear!" Someone else yelled back over the deafening gunfire from the Ma' Deuce
"Rocket!" The projectile flashed down the street and landed at the feet of the naked man, turning him and those around him into bloody chunks of meat and pink mist. "Move!" The man that was holding the AT-4 ordered as he pushed past me with a small group at his side.
A few seconds later he came back with the severed head of... (REDACTED)... Our target.
(REDACTED)'s good eye looked around with firey anger until it met with mine. A sudden look of recognition flashed in it as he tried to speak with what remained of his jaw that hung limply to one side as his left eye swung from its ruined orbital socket.
Hours passed after making a short pitstop back at the "Compound" and we were finally back in FOB (REDACTED), now clad in civilian clothing with our kits stowed and ready for the long flight home.
It's time to leave this blood-soaked battlefield for a while, I thought, pulling the pair of Gatorz down over my eyes While limping towards the open cargo ramp of the waiting C-130 on the flight line.
I felt like I was being watched and decided to glance around, spotting Martin off to my right who instantly waved me over with a bandaged hand.
"I'll be back." I winced, blowing air through my teeth as I broke off from the team.
Martin met with me halfway accompanied by a lean man around my height with a goatee along with a blonde-haired woman with blazing blue eyes.
"This world hides terrible secrets Allen," Martin's gaze was distant as he lit a cigarette that hung loosely from his lips, "What you witnessed today was just one of them.". He nodded towards the man and woman as he blew a plume of smoke up into the air, "These two are apart of my team. You can expect to see them in the future.".
He took another long drag and stubbed out the cigarette, placing the butt into the cargo pocket of his combat pants before holding out his good hand.
I shook it without saying a word before rejoining the rest of my team as they walked up the massive cargo ramp.
submitted by SireBoone to mrcreeps [link] [comments]

2020.10.21 09:10 FACE6000 This is some funny stuff

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up. Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little. Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. - We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies. And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation. Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as... Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try. Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees. We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive. Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant. Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. - Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny. You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud. - We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right. Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on. Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here, here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? - No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line! This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees! Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me! I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point! You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah, I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right, here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on! No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry. No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. - That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't. - Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do. Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look... There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not? - It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine. Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing. Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it. OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle. You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me. This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin' stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! - Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream! Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust. Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. - It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late! It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. - And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! - Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. - What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas 3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this? Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that. What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger. Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. - Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great, if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475, Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism! Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer, have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! - Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing. Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games. - What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order! Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged bea
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2020.10.21 08:54 LapisPuffle deh Fwowo

[deh Fwowo] Ish meh~! Dah gweat Fwowo hewe wit sum moar knowledge fur chu. :3 If chu wead it thowoughly and DM me abowout it chu'll get a bettew chance of nawt getting bwocked~ (faiw wawning doe, ish a bit of a wonggg weaaddd..~
[meeeeeee~] I ish deh Fwowo~! 'w' 15 years old n smaaarht~ blue doggo boye~ woves fwiendsss~ wan yif? yaya~ cum slide into meh dms~ les rp o3o hehe~ wan gamez, pway siege n miencraf.. wove bein siwwy, deh hyper boyo ^w^ i wannnn teh sexiezzzz~ but only if i know chu!!~ no teh lewdies with teh stranger o m o
[teh alutard] I'm not Alucard...in fact, we're...quite different. I've talked to him a bit and believe me, we do not agree on too many things. Maybe my "writing style" is similar to his, but we are two..VERY different people.
[pointlessness ;w;] Spoiler alert: LIFE IS POINTLESSSSSSSS!! You are meaningless in the eyes of the universe! But, that being said, life isn't *completely* pointless :3 " We're here for a good time, not for a long time." So make the most of the time you have, and find that special someone for you..~<3
[uniqueness] I'm..dangerously unique. I'm not like other boys~ I'm quirky & loveable :3 I love playin gamesss~ And talkinnnnnn in VC. I could talk for hourssss, about anything, really.
[rawrrmance..~] I love romance. I want true love. I want to find that special someone that you deeply love, wanna be with forever.. The person you'd wanna snuggle and cuddle with always, who you can trust... Who you’d wanna...f-fuck every night...~ The person you’d wanna push past problems with, comfort, who you wanna love and cherish forever.
["real"-ality] Nothing is real. You're not real, to me at least. Reality is subjective, your existence is superposition to me. You both do & don't exist at the same time. You exist in the sense that you're reading this, but until I get concrete evidence of your existence as a person, you're just another one of the voices in my head ;3
[pawlitics] Politics are stupid. There are no winners. It's a pointless game. To see which side can conjur up more stupidity. Laughable, really. Fun to watch the whole situation unfold though!
[people in general] People are the worst. Their greed and selfishness knows no bounds. They'll use you for whatever they want and then just discard you like a used tissue. It's funny, how people think that they stil matter. And that they're "uNiQuE" and "oNe Of A kINd". c'est la vie! I know the cycle, I've been through it countless times. I'm tired of it. Tired of being used. Well, no more. Anyone who wants to talk to me needs to earn my respect. Don't ask how, that's up to you. But I can say that if you hop into my DMs with some dumb one-liner and it's clear you're not making an effort, it won't last long. ;~;
[ignorance] Ignorance is bliss, but knowing is fun. It's best not to speak unless you really know where you're coming from. If you're unsure of something, fact check it. Clearly you have internet access, so just Google it. It's not hard to do really, yet people stil manage to get things wrong. If you are going to talk to me, at least know what you're talking aobut. It's fairly easy to end up on my blocked list, so best try to avoid that if you want any kind of long-term interaction.
[trust] Trust. Relationships are built on it. But there's too much given out. Trust is dangerous. Trust the wrong people and you might end up dead, heartbroken, or -gasp- an NPC!! Hec, you shouldn't even trust me immediately. You need to know someone for a bit of time before they're worthy of any small amount of trust.
[apologies] Apologizing is for NPCs. Apologies are such utter bullshit. If you ever upset me, do not apologize. Apologies are a lazy attempt at making the problem all better in just two words. If you really cared, at least more than an NPC, you'd be able to fix said problem in more than two words. Try and make it up to whoever you upset. Just admit you were wrong, you acted impulsively. It's not that hard. "It takes a big man to admit he's wrong" but it only takes an NPC to say "i'M sORRy".
[furries] You may be wondering why all my bots only use furry tags. Weeeelllllllll, let's just say, that of all the people, non-furries are the worst. Sure, there are some pretty autistic furries who should've been wiped off the face of the earth years ago, but at least if you're a furry you manage to show *some* free will. Becoming a furry is a conscious decision, so you at least have -part- of a brain. o3o Even given that, furries are still a shit stain on this earth. If I could detach myself from the entire furry "community" I would. Yet it clings to me, like a tumor, of which I can never remove. My identity lies more in my "fursona" than it does in my person at this point. In a way furries are the smart ones, they've already accomplished more than the average person. Yet the community still manages to be one of the most toxic to ever exist. You can make the argument "weLl eVerY cOMmUnIty HaS a fEw bAd EgGs" but it's more than "a few", it's the majority of the fandom. The minority at this point is those so-called "good eggs". Is it a tragedy? Maybe. But it was doomed to fail since the beginning. u m u
[insanity] Now you're gonna go to the bottom of this post, find the invite link to my server, join, and just DM me about how I'm "insane" or "need to see a therapist" ;~; But maybe consider for a second my point of view? I've been around the block a few times and I know what people are like. I know what relationships are like. I know what life is like. It. Fucking. Sucks. But I broke the cycle and you can too, all you need to do is realize that it exists int the firstplace. That the system is designed to prevent free speech. Sure we have laws that *technically* allow it, but the second you say something "socially unacceptable" you got the NPC SJWs on your ass.
[predictability] People are so predictable~! 99% of the time all they give is dumb one-liners because they don't give a flying f u c k about you :3 Ohhhh nyooo! Deh wittle NPC thinks they are different!! Chur right, chu is DEH ONWY pewson that is actuawwy unique!! Congwatttsssss~ jk, you're not unique. You don't matter. The only person that matters, is me. o 3 o
[relationships] Relationships are dumb, really. You ask someone out, you go out, they say they love you, one of you does something done and what you built up in 4 months is suddenly gone in 10 minutes. That's just how it goes. If you come in looking for a relationship with me, don't. I'm not going to date you unless I really know you, and feel at least _some_ kind of emotional attachment (rare) to you.
[low-effort] If you wanna talk, make an effort. ANY effort. Just **try**. If you're a terrible conversation carrier then just ignore this whole thing. Don't even bother adding me if that's the case. Try to find a common interest, it's not hard, really. If the conversation dries up enough I'll just un-add you, or better yet, block you!~ :0
[reading material] Wanna see some genuine autism I've had to deal with? Or I guess you could treat it as more of a "what-not-to-say" when(if) you decide to talk to me. https://acoa.owo.rip/
[furries r weirddddddd~ o m o] For years, since ancient history, anthropomorphism has been a common occurrence in ancient cultures, societies, beliefs, religions, communities, and almost every conceivable historic group out there. Humans as a species boast a certain informational intake from their surroundings, trying to explain the world around them, it is the reasoning of gods and deities. Animals in term showing distinctive characteristics of life and symbolically representing regions and peoples through their behaviors and activities. Take Egypt for example, you have gods like set Anubis, and Rah, these are only some of the gods of Egypt and they look somewhat befitting of this analogy. Take Greece, for another example, that had its various creatures like minotaurs, Gorgons, Sirens, all manners of creatures that existed at that time in myths and legends of their own making. If you wish to escape the west you can visit the east where you can find Japan, with its kappa which is basically, frogmen that kidnap children. To the west you have the wendigo and all the fantastical humanoid creatures and their tales of the Americas, If you want to visit more modern times you can find the Yeti, Bigfoot, Moth man, Reptilians and all manners of myths, legends, and gods that humanity created with its inspiration for thousands of years. In many cases, humanity has been its own inspiration which is why we have anthropomorphism in the first place. A mixture of human and animal in one. There is much history to be drawn here, magical tales, and aspects of great deeds and adventures, exploring the deep annals of history in which mankind has existed is not void of these things. Fascinating folklore, stories, and images utilizing anthropomorphism, and as such I can one hundred percent see a fandom being made to celebrate these great things- but there's just one problem... "the furry fandom reveres fucking none of this". And this just absolutely baffles me because there is so much history to go with this, so many tales and stories, it's been rooted in our existence, It could be a topic of great discussion something that could maybe even be educational. Instead, it is discarded for sexual fetishes and degeneracy alongside with hugs, kisses, and cuddles all the fucking time. It stupifies me that something so deep, interesting, and rich, something real could be exchanged for...Cartoons, and porn...lots of it. Its as if the furry fandom just discards this rich history because It doesn't realize that it already is a part of a legacy. Believe it or not, when it comes to anthropomorphism the furry fandom is going to leave its mark, a dirty fucking stab, but its still going to be left there for the entirety of human history. The thing is anthropomorphism has been with us for such a long time and today its continuously being added upon because...human inspiration will not cease to exist. As said previously, all that is around us inspires us- and we bring that into our daily lives as what we do and what we create. As such, we birth all manners of things from it, and the furry fandom is no exception from it- Regardless of how vile and obscene it may seem. And even in modern-day when we can tell stories from ancient Egypt and whatnot far better than we have ever before, evert It doesn't seem like they take any sort of inspiration from this, which is very strange. It might just be because the modern-day matter is to be stressed constantly and ifs just becoming the norm, people don't care anymore, or... There is another alternative. It might also be the rebirth of the furry empire. In the 1500s Spain launched a campaign for dominance over the Aztec empire's territories in an attempt to expand Spanish influence over vast portions of South America. In the Aztec empire's societal structure warriors served m an integral part of the military, being skilled in combat and spiting fear in the enemy. They served as shock troops and guards for Aztec leaders and individuals of high status. But you could be more than just a warrior, you could be a warrior of a certain animal or aspect, like a warrior of the jaguar, or the warrior of the eagle. As such, you would be marked with special paints and dyes, but to add on to this you were also given a suit representative of the given creature that you share an aspect of. So with the Aztec empire came with the birth of the first-ever furries to have blighted the world. The Spanish knew that such traditions acting as grievous affronts to god's green earth must be eradicated but did not dare touch them out of fear of catching their sinful ways themselves. But Herr& Cortes had an ace up his sleeve, if they wished to infect his men with the furry plight- he would create one of his very own makings. "And with the simple application of the Spanish Peasant, smallpox had spread through the empire." Smallpox was a codeword for mini-aids.
[am nawt schizo!~] Schizophrenia is a mental illness that develops over time. The earliest you'd see signs that a person may have schizophrenia is age 16, and even that is extremely rare. I'm 15, not 16. I may exhibit the symptoms, but I'm lacking a diagnosis. And quite frankly, I don't need to get tested. I know the answer already. You're just fucking jealous that I'm so much more than you. I'm smarter, prettier, funnier, and overall objectively better. Come add me and be a butthurt little bitch in my DMs. I could care fucking less. I'm not schizophrenic, and you can't accuse me of it. :3
[deh big scawy fwo >.<] I ish deh big and scawwwwwwwy fwowo u 3 u vewy intimidating, i knowzzz...but pwease don't be awfaid to cum taaaawk uwu I wove making new fwiends as wong as chur nice to mehhhh~!
[denial] I'm in denial. Of how stupid society is. There is just no feasable way for such a large collective amount of people to be this fucking idiotic. It just can't be. I suppose stranger things have happened, but this is just so much. Yet I'm the insane one. In a world full of retards.
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2020.10.21 06:44 squish_ee Comments from an unspoiled viewer: Week 2

(I'm still trying to figure out the best was to format these, so apologies if it's a bit hard to read. I'll come back and edit the post if it looks too wonky!)
Last week I posted "comments from an unspoiled viewer" and a couple people liked it, so I'm back again! As a refresher: my mom has never watched any show in the Bachelor franchise before, but given the "surprises" coming up this season, I thought it would be interesting to make her watch with me. She's completely unspoiled because she's not on social media, and also because she doesn't care about any of this at all, lol.
Here were some of my favorite comments she made about tonight's episode:

(On the first group date)
(After no one immediately grabs Clare during after her lil speech at the start of the cocktail party)
(On her 1-on-1 with Jason now)
(On the dodgeball group date)
(At the cocktail party)
Final thoughts: Neither of us were a fan of the strip dodgeball date. Mom said several times that she agrees with Yosef that it was "classless," though she thinks he's acting like an ass about it. Personally, I think having them strip in the first place was already too much, but I really didn't like that the losing team had to make a "walk of shame" back to the room. That... didn't feel okay.
ALSO? I was NOT aware that jock straps are 1) completely assless, and 2) worn instead of underwear, instead of oveunder them. I was absolutely shook by these men's BARE ASSES being just OUT THERE, black box or not. AND Y'ALL. SOME OF THEM JUST? TOOK THE JOCK STRAPS COMPLETELY OFF AND THEN THEY WERE NAKED? ACTUALLY NAKED? AND THEY WALKED BACK TO THE ROOM LIKE THAT? AND SAT DOWN ON THE COUCHES AND CHATTED WITH THE OUTHER GUYS WITH THEIR FULL PENISES OUT AND THEIR LITERAL ASSHOLES FLUSH AGAINST THE COUCH CUSHIONS? I know this post is supposed to be about my mom's comments, not mine, but someone please... I can't be the only one who's freaking out over this! Like, that was nuts (heh), right!? My brain is on fire, I'm dying.
Mom was also a bit put off by Clare sending Brandon home, and we ended up talking about it for like 20 minutes after the episode ended, even rewinding to rewatch the scene several times and analyze it carefully, lol. I think we came to a consensus that Brandon just like... IMMEDIATELY put his foot in his mouth, and really screwed himself by being like "The second I found out about you I just KNEW I had to be here!!!!!! Haha I mean no idk anything about you or your history... but ur hot tho."
Until next week!
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BTS Dating Game- ♡ Smut Edition ♡ (Long) - YouTube ICP DATING GAME LYRICS - YouTube Dirty Dating Games - YouTube GOT7 Dating Game +18 BTS DATING GAME  SMUT VER. After Class  Dirty Dating Game + Would you rather BTS ... Dirty Dating Game EXO Dating Game (Smut Version) GOT7 Dating Game  Dirty Version - YouTube

8 Fun, Flirty Games for Your Naughty House Party

  1. BTS Dating Game- ♡ Smut Edition ♡ (Long) - YouTube
  3. Dirty Dating Games - YouTube
  4. GOT7 Dating Game +18
  6. After Class Dirty Dating Game + Would you rather BTS ...
  7. Dirty Dating Game
  8. EXO Dating Game (Smut Version)
  9. GOT7 Dating Game Dirty Version - YouTube
  10. Bts Dating Game (dirty version)

hi babes!! ♥‿♥ WHERE MA HARD STANS AT?! Soooo this is a joint account, we are two friends (mommy and moon), anddddd this is our first video!! So we hope you all enjoyed it and there will be ... Full combination of dirty + dating games = Dirty Dating Games for having some fun.... Keep visiting my channel as we upload new Naughty Games, Funny Games, K... If you think hormones ran crazy when you were in high school then you're in for a rollercoaster in university. Thankfully there are plenty of boys to choose ... Hopefully you enjoyed the video, if you enjoyed live a like. If you want more of these kinds of videos, dirty or not let me know! The music i used in this vi... EXO DATING GAME EPISODE ONE [OT9] - Duration: 13:49. Laura Serrano 11,567 views. 13:49. Language: English Location: United States Restricted Mode: Off History Help The Whitest Kids You Know perform sketches at UGA. Attention!! Explicit content!! We hope you will enjoy our video. Let us know what will you get in the comments down below. Have fun! This is our last GOT7 Dating Game, the next ones will be about ... i do not own any part of this video**** music nor video itself***..... i.c.p.(insane clown posse) dating game Heyo it's me I made a smut edition dating game because I'm DEFINITELY not a soft stan. i'm suuuper kinky actually so ahem enjoy this DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE MU... i was bored it took me like idk 2-3 days to finish this on imovie cause i procrastinate a lot so it sucks i also got lazy towards the ending u you see some o...